Ways To Tell If You're The Rebound
Nobody wants to be someone else's rebound. A rebound is a placeholder, a stepping stone between real relationships. To the other person, you're just a footnote in their romantic story, before they start looking for something with more long-term appeal. If you'd rather not be a prop to help another person overcome their emotional issues and feel better about their previous relationship, look for these telltale signs.
He constantly compares you to his ex
Depending on the proximity of the previous relationship, a little bit of this is only human nature. Plus, it can feel great to hear someone say, "Wow, I can't believe I wasted so much time with them when someone as amazing as you was here all along." It's a self-confidence booster, for sure, but if your new partner keeps bringing it up, it might be time to hoist a red flag.
When you truly move on from a person, they no longer occupy your thoughts on a regular basis. Continually bringing up an ex to a new bae is a clear sign there are lingering feelings. And how do so many people get over an ex they can't quite leave in the past? You guessed it...
You instantly go exclusive
Beware the serial monogamist. In love, anything is possible, but what are the chances you're going to meet "The One" immediately after exiting a relationship? There's a Nobel Prize waiting for anyone who can figure out that math. A partner looking to lock you up way too soon is seeking the comfort and habit of their previous relationship. Anyone who has been in a long-term relationship understands the benefits that come with it versus casually dating.
After breaking things off, long-term relationship benefits tend to be the things you miss the most, besides the actual person. It's going to sleep with the love of your life in bed next to you every night. It's planning for your future together. It's the dumb, cutesy inside jokes that would make your friends vomit if they heard you say them in public. Someone looking to go exclusive a little too early is looking to fast forward to those things from their previous relationship that they miss. And if they're still yearning for their previous relationship, there's isn't much hope for the two of you to properly start a new one.
It's all about sex
If the relationship never grows beyond booty calls, it might be time to raise an eyebrow. You may just be acting as living proof that the quickest way to get over someone is to get under someone else. When two people are into each other, they naturally want to spend more time together. But if your partner is only sleeping with you to erase the memory of their ex, they won't be waste time and energy building anything deeper.
They're buddy-buddy with their ex
It isn't damning in and of itself, but it might be a bad sign if your new love is spending a lot of time together with their ex. Consider it evidence that your partner isn't quite over their last relationship. There's nothing necessarily wrong with remaining friends with an ex, but some distance should be maintained to ensure a proper split. Every situation is different, but keep your eyes open.
Their ex cheated on them
Cheating hurts, but that doesn't excuse someone from making you the rebound. When we're hurt, we (often) want the person who wronged us to feel it too—or at least see that we "moved on" to someone else. Right place, right time? Or are you just another person's revenge? Make sure the feelings are legitimate, so you're not just a weapon between exes. This doesn't necessarily ensure you're a rebound, but just be wary.