How To Navigate Your Changing World During A Divorce — Exclusive

We may receive a commission on purchases made from links.

It is not uncommon to feel intense and constantly changing emotions when you're going through a divorce (via Psych Central). Pain, anger, frustration, loneliness, fear, and other complicated feelings can hit you at unexpected times and in extremes. Speaking exclusively witH The List, divorce coach and author Alicia Robertson shared that along with the "intense period of grief" that comes with losing a union that held a lot of promise for you and your loved one, there is also "the fact that it is a grief that is not generally understood, or supported in a healthy way."

One other painful repercussion of divorce is the major change to your everyday life. Everything that was once familiar to you is no more within your reach. Your loved one has moved out (or vice versa) and you're left to go through life alone. You don't have a husband or a wife to depend on anymore, per Good Therapy. Robertson, who is the founder and CEO of Lemonade Life, a coaching business that helps people navigate life changes like divorce, notes that there could also be the additional responsibility of single parenting and co-parenting. "Everything about it is unfamiliar, unknown, and incredibly daunting," she said. Robertson's book "Make Lemonade: Thrive through Divorce by Transforming Your Life" talks about her own experience with separation and how she dealt with this painful time.

While there is no one-size-fits-all approach to handling the emotional stress of a divorce, there are some things you can be doing if you find yourself in a similar situation. 

Make space for your emotions and find a support system

The feelings you experience after divorce are often going to be confusing for people around you and even yourself, but that's okay. You may also feel a lot of guilt over the end of a marriage. Start by forgiving yourself and surrounding yourself with people who can help make the pain bearable, whether that's friends, family, or a support group. But be careful about how much information you share with those around you, advises Zina Arinze, who has herself been through a divorce (via Good Housekeeping). People are not often equipped with the knowledge of what not to say to someone who is going through a divorce, so their prying questions can become another source of pain for you. 

Spending some time figuring yourself out — what your likes and interests are, what kind of self-care rituals you enjoy, etc. — can also be helpful when you're navigating the changing world around you. You might benefit from counseling, too. There are also legal proceedings that, although unnerving, are inevitable processes you're going to have to go through to finalize your divorce. Understanding the business side of things and how you can amicably and fairly go through the process together is important, reports Forbes.  

Being on social media during a separation can be hard (via Psychology Today), and divorce coach and author Alicia Robertson had some advice in this area, as well.

Try not to engage with your ex's social media feed

Social media can become a vehicle to vent your own emotional turmoil from the breakup or even stalk your ex, per Psychology Today, none of which are healthy activities as you navigate these changing circumstances. 

"Simply put, unfollow!" advises Robertson. It's easy to assume that your ex is having the time of their life just by looking at their Instagram feed, but by resisting the temptation to do so, you're giving yourself the much-required time and space to heal (via Psychology Today).

Robertson added, "Do not engage in any information that does not serve your healing and recovery." It's important to identify how being on social media and seeing your ex's posts is affecting you. If you feel that they are taking away from your healing and causing you more pain, just unfollow and disengage. You would be better off asking for direct information from them than coming to conclusions based on their highlight reel. According to Robertson, the most important thing is to "stay in your lane, and out of theirs."