Before You Give Up On Your Relationship, Ask Yourself If It's A Roommate Problem
There comes a time in every relationship when the question of whether there is a future arises. After your relationship's honeymoon phase is over, it's common to experience more disagreements and arguments. Conflicts in relationships are inevitable, and every couple goes through periods of experiencing highs and lows together. It can be difficult to know whether you're in a funk in your relationship, or whether it's time to pull the plug and move on.
Living with a significant other takes patience, communication, and working together to ensure each partner is happy and content. It's extremely common for couples to argue over even household chores. A Yelp study found that 80% of people who live with their partners disagree about housework. A partner not pulling their weight around the house is grounds for a talk, but is it really enough to end a relationship? If you're becoming fed up with your partner and want to end the relationship over household problems, you may want to reconsider your approach.
Roommate issues need to be addressed
Do you find yourself annoyed when your partner leaves dirty dishes in the sink instead of putting them in the dishwasher? Maybe your partner never takes out the garbage or forgets to put their clothes away after a long day. There is no denying that these things can put stress on a relationship. A 2007 study published in the American Journal of Public Health journal found that wives whose husbands were less involved in housework experienced more stress and overall unhappiness compared to those whose husbands were highly involved in housework.
"Couples should not be stuck on roommate issues," psychotherapist Genesis Games tells Oprah Daily. "Come to some form of consensus on them — it doesn't have to be perfect — and move on." Rather than give up on your relationship, you and your partner should work to set boundaries and reach an agreement. Setting boundaries is one of the most important healthy relationship habits you should prioritize with your partner.
How to balance housework with your partner
In order to set boundaries and avoid conflict over chores, don't ask your partner for help — this could be interpreted by your partner that you are implying you are solely in charge of the chores, per Verywell Mind. Instead, sit down with your partner to create a chore chart based on each of your priorities. Then, NBC News recommends developing a schedule and splitting the chores between the two of you. Assigning days for certain chores will help ensure that the tasks get done on time and that no chore is forgotten.
Rather than nagging your partner about the chores they haven't done yet, touch base with one another at the end of the week to discuss what worked and what didn't work. You can communicate your thoughts, talk about what can be changed, and tweak your plan to ensure both of you are satisfied. By opening up the line of communication, you and your partner will be able to balance housework responsibilities while keeping your relationship healthy and happy.