Secrets Taylor Swift revealed about her relationships on her album Lover

Taylor Swift's album Lover, the seventh studio album from the superstar, was finally released on Friday, Aug. 23, 2019, following months of speculation and many an Easter egg from the queen of dropping hints. Following Reputation, Swift's undisputedly darkest era, Lover — with its cotton candy music video visuals and fresh, poppy sound — was perhaps Swift's most-anticipated album to-date. 

As noted by fans and critics alike, Lover is also Swift's most personal album ever. The songstress is known for the catchy, autobiographical, and largely self-written lyrics that propelled her to fame, and Lover certainly doesn't lack for a bevy of songs fit for some kind of pop music confessional. With Lover, Swift tackles sexism, her mother's battle with cancer, and, on a happier note, her incredibly private relationship with British actor Joe Alwyn. With the album, Swift has proven that she's no longer a heartbroken teenage girl. Instead, she's a woman who has learned from her losses and has turned them into Lover. Now, she's ready to take her fans "into the daylight" with her, and she's sharing some intimate details along the way. Here's a look at the secrets Taylor Swift revealed about her relationships on her album, Lover.

Taylor Swift seems to have nothing but "indifference" for ex-flame Calvin Harris

Taylor Swift's album may be called Lover, but its opening song, "I Forgot That You Existed," has nothing to do with love. In fact, Swift herself sings on the track, "It isn't love, it isn't hate, it's just indifference." 

Swift is famous for carefully choosing her words while penning lyrics, so it's safe to say the songstress intended to send a strong message by saying she only feels "indifference" about a past relationship. Many fans have theorized that Swift's incredibly public romance and extremely messy breakup with DJ Calvin Harris, whom she dated for over a year, is the broken relationship that inspired the catchy tune.

In an exclusive "Spotify Storyline" for "I Forgot That You Existed," Swift revealed (via Reddit and Parade), "With the first song on this new album I wanted to bring us out of the [Reputation] era [...] This song closes the book on [Reputation] in resolving that whole conflict with a shrug." Honestly, what's more indifferent than a shrug?

Taylor Swift may have revealed exactly where she fell in love with Joe Alwyn in this Lover song

Taylor Swift has never been one to shy away from revealing intimate details about her personal relationships, and she's never been scared to call an ex-lover out by name ("Dear John" is widely accepted by fans to be a song about her short-lived relationship with John Mayer).

That said, the singer has been famously private about the details surrounding her romance with actor Joe Alwyn, whom she's dated for nearly three years as of Lover's release. The two rarely — if ever — interact on social media, talk about each other in interviews, or make public appearances together. However, with Taylor Swift's album Lover, she decided to give fans an inside look at their relationship — possibly even revealing exactly where she first fell in love with him.

In "Cornelia Street," Swift sings about the New York City street on which she lived during the beginning of a love story, presumably with Alwyn. The songstress reminisces about the "sacred new beginnings" that took place in her old apartment on that street, admitting that if her lover were to ever leave her, she'd "never walk Cornelia Street again."

Taylor Swift loves her fans, but often feels trapped

Taylor Swift has made a massively successful career for herself by confessing her deepest fears, secrets, and greatest heartaches through song. Like its predecessors, Swift's album Lover doubles as a sort of audio confessional in which Swift reveals the inner workings of her mind. However, the singer-songwriter decided to take the diary-like feel of her album to the next level by releasing excerpts from her actual diaries.

The diary entries, which she started writing when she was 13 years old, cover everything from Swift's middle school locker combination to her initial feelings following the night Kanye West famously interrupted her VMAs acceptance speech. In one entry (via Reddit), dated Aug. 14, 2013, Swift wrote about hating herself for feeling "in any way ungrateful for this mostly perfect life."

She continued by comparing her fame to a cage, writing, "But this mostly perfect life can feel a lot like being a tiger in a wildlife enclosure. It's pretty in there, but you can't get out." 

Taylor Swift didn't want anyone to find out about her relationship with Joe Alwyn

After Taylor Swift's cruel summer of 2016, the singer retreated from the spotlight in a major way. She stopped giving interviews, walked sideways in an attempt to evade the flashing cameras of the paparazzi, and took whatever route possible to avoid becoming another tabloid headline. Ironically, during her darkest days, Swift entered into the relationship that would go on to inspire her happiest, most romantic album yet. However, due to the lengths she went to for peace and privacy, no one knew that Swift was falling in love in late 2016 — and, according to her diary, that's exactly how the songstress wanted things to stay. 

In a January 2017 diary entry released with a deluxe version of Lover (via Reddit), Swift wrote about her relationship with Joe Alwyn, revealing, "I'm essentially based in London, hiding out, trying to protect us from the nasty world that just wants to ruin things." The singer continued, "We have been together and no one has found out for [three] months now. I want it to stay that way because I don't want anything about this to change."

Lover makes it clear Joe Alwyn has turned Taylor Swift into a London girl

As she revealed in her January 2017 diary entry, London served as a safe haven for Taylor Swift and her British boyfriend, Joe Alwyn, during the early stages of their relationship. So, it only makes sense that Swift, a longtime Nashville resident, would have a special place in her heart for the Big Smoke.

In fact, Swift apparently adores London (and Alwyn) so much that she dedicated an entire Lover track to her beau's hometown. The song, aptly titled "London Boy," is an ode to  Swift's favorite things about London — and, unsurprisingly, the part of London she loves the most seems to be Alwyn himself.

In "London Boy," Lover's 11th track, Swift sings, "Took me back to Highgate, met all of his best mates / So, I guess all the rumors are true / You know I love a London Boy." Later, the songstress makes it clear that she wants to be wherever her lover is, singing, "They say home is where the heart is / But, God, I love the English." It certainly sounds like this former country crooner is a London gal now.

Taylor Swift isn't shy about wanting to marry Joe Alwyn, as evidenced in Lover

Many Swifties felt that "Lover," with its slow, enchanting Mazzy Star sound and unmistakably romantic lyrics, was a hint from Taylor Swift that she and Joe Alwyn were secretly engaged. Some fans even theorized that the title track's music video would consist of footage from Swift and Alwyn's engagement — or maybe even their marriage. And while those theories were put to rest when the actual music video was released on Aug. 22, 2019 — Swift made it crystal clear with her self-written lyrics in "Lover" that she hopes to someday marry her British beau. 

In what is sure to be the go-to wedding song for couples across the globe, Swift reveals that she wants to go where her lover goes "forever and ever," singing, "I've loved you three summers now, honey, but I want 'em all." In the song's bridge, Swift sings hypothetical wedding vows, delicately crooning, "Ladies and gentleman, will you please stand? / With every guitar string scar on my hand / I take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover." Does anyone else hear wedding bells?

Taylor Swift opened up about her fights with Joe Alwyn in her album Lover

With Lover, Taylor Swift proved that she'd fully shed the snake skin from the Reputation era, leaving it for romantic, whimsical sounds and colorful butterfly imagery. As its title suggests, Lover is an album that focuses on, well, love. However, Swift noticeably avoided romanticizing the simple idea of love itself — instead, she included songs on Lover that explore the vulnerable, unpredictable, and scary side of loving and being loved by another person.

In "Afterglow," the superstar sings about arguing with her lover (who we're to believe is Joe Alwyn), and perfectly encapsulates the soul-crushing fear that she'll ruin their relationship by picking fights and blowing things out of proportion. Swift sings, "I lived like an island, punished you with silence / Went off like sirens, just crying / Why'd I have to break what I love so much?" 

In the song's chorus, Swift desperately croons about not wanting to lose her lover, singing, "I'm the one who burned us down / But it's not what I meant / I'm sorry that I hurt you." She added, "I don't wanna lose this with you." 

Taylor Swift turned to faith after her mom's cancer diagnosis

Taylor Swift has always been vocal about the close bond she shares with her mother, Andrea — even writing a song about how much she cherishes their relationship. That song, titled "The Best Day," is the 12th track on Swift's second studio album, Fearless. In a callback to the sweet, acoustic tune from Swift's early days as a rising star, the 12th track on Lover was also written about Andrea. However, unlike "The Best Day," the dedication to Swift's beloved mother on Lover – a collaboration with the Dixie Chicks titled "Soon You'll Get Better" — is a far cry from a feel-good song. Instead, it's a heartbreaking ballad penned by Swift about her mother's battle with cancer

In the emotional tune, Swift admits that she turned to faith to help her cope with her mother's illness, singing, "Holy orange bottles, each night, I pray to you / Desperate people find faith, so now I pray to Jesus, too." The song is perhaps Swift's most personal. As she revealed in an interview with CBS Sunday Morning, "I can't even really hear [it] — I can't even listen to it."

Did Taylor Swift fall for Joe Alwyn while she was dating Tom Hiddleston?

As any Taylor Swift fan knows, 2016 was a rollercoaster of emotions for the star. From her reignited feud with Kanye West to her strange, short-lived summer romance with Tom Hiddleston, to the quiet beginning of her relationship with Joe Alwyn in the fall — 2016 was certainly a formative year in Swift's life. In fact, it would appear that Swift is still processing her emotions from that particular time, as evidenced by "Cruel Summer," the second track on Lover.

In the song, Swift reminisces about falling in love with a summer fling. However, with lyrics like, "Bad, bad boy, shiny toy with a price / You know that I bought it," Swift seems to admit having a few reservations about the romance. As some critics have noted, if the song is based on Swift's tumultuous 2016 summer, the singer was still dating Hiddleston when she started secretly falling for Alwyn — whom she allegedly first met at the May 2016 Met Gala.

Taylor Swift's relationship with Joe Alwyn has changed how she views love

Released in October 2012, Taylor Swift's fourth studio album, Red, was the start of her country-to-pop crossover. Containing some of her most beloved songs, including "State of Grace," "All Too Well," and "22," Red was definitely a game-changer for Swift's career. Of course, writing songs about the nuances of heartache is what Swift does best — so it should come as no surprise that many of the tracks on the Grammy-nominated album were reportedly inspired by the singer's December 2010 breakup with actor Jake Gyllenhaal.

In the album's title track, Swift sings about the various colors of falling in and out of love, belting, "Losing him was blue like I've never known … But loving him was red." However, it appears that Swift's relationship with Joe Alwyn has the star seeing love in a different color. In "Daylight," the last song on Swift's Lover, she sings, "I once believed love would be (black and white) / But it's golden," noting, "I once believed love would be (burning red) / But it's golden, like daylight." 

Joe Alwyn's "quiet confidence" is apparently what drew Taylor Swift to the actor

Taylor Swift rarely discusses boyfriend Joe Alwyn, opting instead to only hint at her years-long relationship with the actor through carefully crafted song lyrics. The "Delicate" singer explained to The Guardian in a 2019 interview, "I've learned that if I do [talk about my relationship], people think it's up for discussion, and our relationship isn't up for discussion."

However, "I Think He Knows," the sixth track on Lover, seems to reveal what exactly attracted Swift to Alwyn in the first place. In the upbeat tune, Swift sings about her lover's "indigo eyes" and his "hand on [her] thigh," revealing that she wants to "see what's under that attitude." As the pop star explained during an iHeartRadio Lover album release party, she wrote "I Think He Knows" with the "idea of quiet confidence" in mind. 

"There are certain people who just walk in and they don't need to be arrogant because there's something beaming from within them," Swift explained, adding, "Some people just seem like they know who they are, they don't need to brag about it."

Taylor Swift released diary pages discussing her relationship with Scott Borchetta

Scott Borchetta — the president of Taylor Swift's previous (and very first) label, Big Machine Records — became headline news in June 2019 when it was announced that he'd sold Big Machine Label Group for approximately $300 million dollars to talent manager Scooter Braun. Swift, who signed with Republic Records and Universal Music Group in November 2018, soon went public with her thoughts on Borchetta's decision, writing that all she could think about was Braun's "incessant, manipulative bullying." She continued, "This is my worst case scenario. This is what happens when you sign a deal at fifteen to someone for whom the term 'loyalty' is clearly just a contractual concept."

However, as old diary entries released with the deluxe editions of Lover reveal, Swift was excited and hopeful about her budding professional relationship with Borchetta before her career started to take off. "[Borchetta's] so passionate about this project," Swift wrote in a 2004 entry (via Entertainment Tonight), noting, "I want to surround myself with passionate people." The star went on, "I'm not sad about [not signing with] Capitol, [because] I don't want to be lost on a big label."

In Lover, Taylor Swift revealed how her anxiety still affects her relationships

In diary pages released with deluxe versions of Lover, a pre-stardom Taylor Swift writes about her feelings of anxiety. "I don't know if I can do this. I want it so bad but I get so scared of what might not happen," Swift wrote in a 2003 entry (via Entertainment Tonight). She continued, "It'll be okay. I've got to hang on. … I'm only 13. I'm allowed to make mistakes, right? Oh, this is a lot to handle."

In Lover's fifth track, "The Archer," Swift's lyrics seem to hint that these anxious feelings, along with past relationships and heartache, still color the way she views herself — subsequently affecting her relationship with (presumably) Joe Alwyn. "I wake in the night, I pace like a ghost / The room is on fire, invisible smoke / And all of my heroes die all alone / Help me hold onto you," Swift sings over a haunting, '80s-inspired synth melody. She continues, "Who could ever leave me, darling? / But, who could stay?"

Still, despite her anxious tendencies, Swift's relationship seems more promising than ever before — as evidenced by Lover's title track.