Marriage Therapist Details The 3 Jobs With The Highest Rates Of Infidelity - Exclusive
Marriage is an important partnership that requires support, especially when one or both individuals have demanding lives at work. It's no secret that poor work/life balance can lead to problems at home. If you have noticed your husband has been acting out of character, has put up an emotional wall between the two of you, and has been caught in strings of lies, those are just some habits men do when they're cheating.
But what causes infidelity, and are certain lifestyles more prone to marital problems? We got an exclusive look into the mind of "the father of modern infidelity counseling" Dr. Talal Alsaleem. An award winning marriage counselor, Dr. Alsaleem revealed to us the three jobs with the highest rates of infidelity. Their high-stress environments and ability to cause disconnect between partners can lead to cheating in some relationships. These careers come with loads of stress and can put an undue burden on a marriage, opening the door to infidelity.
Military personnel
Deployment in the military — especially far away from one's family — is an invaluable sacrifice that only a fraction of the public take on. And while many military couples have successful long distance relationships, the circumstances surrounding military deployment can increase the incentives to cheat and decrease risk of being caught. Those concerns don't end when a deployed partner returns home. "The prolonged long distance and the difficulties in adjusting to living at home in between deployment can cause significant relationship deficits and failure to meet each other's needs," marriage counselor Dr. Talal Alsaleem said. "The frequent deployment can put a lot of strain on an individual's mental health and the relationship with their significant others."
During deployments, Dr. Alsaleem tells us that culture and circumstances associated with being in the military can condone — and even encourage — infidelity. "Many people fantasize about having an affair, but don't cross the line because of the fear of discovery," Dr. Alsaleem said. "Being deployed in a different state or country allows for higher levels of anonymity and fewer concerns about discovery." And since infidelity can be common in some military spaces, the "membership in a cultural group that doesn't frown upon infidelity makes it easier to engage in it."
Police officers, firefighters, nurses, and first responders
Dr. Talal Alsaleem noted how the high stress work environments of this category of workers can feed into marital problems. While the work that nurses and first responders like police officers and firefighters do on a daily basis is invaluable, it can weigh a heavy toll on both those individuals and their relationships. "Individuals who work in these occupations have a very challenging work environment that requires working long and odd hours, mandatory overtime, and exposure to high levels of trauma, all of which can impact the individual's mental health as well as their relationship satisfaction with their significant other," Dr. Alsaleem said. Disconnection can arise between partners if mix-matched work schedules and emotional upheaval occurs, all while their significant other struggles to relate to the occupational hardships.
"The disconnect leaves individuals with these jobs with limited outlets for venting and processing which they can only do with their work colleagues who they feel connected to," Dr. Alsaleem said. Once the relationship has begun to fragment, the strong bonds and close proximity of co-workers can threaten a relationship — think of all the hospital hookups between doctors in "Grey's Anatomy."
High pressure sales and corporate ladder climbers
The third and final category of jobs that Dr. Talal Alsaleem points towards as a breeding ground for infidelity revolves around corporate ladder climbers and those working in high pressure sales jobs. It's no secret that some corporate work environments can be cutthroat and demanding, leading to "a whatever-it-takes approach" to complete assigned tasks and reach goals, according to Dr. Alsaleem. The constant pressure and irregular hours of corporate workaholics "can put a lot of strain on the individual as well as their relationship with their significant others," the marriage therapist said.
Some corporate and sales jobs require frequent travel and wooing over clients with expensive dinners and perks, which Dr. Alsaleem said can lead to "blurring the boundaries and reducing the risk of discovery" for cheating partners. Additionally, toxic corporate environments that include abuses of power and "quid pro quo dynamics" can make infidelity all the more accessible.
While no job is perfect, there are clearly some that require extra effort when trying to build and maintain a healthy relationship. Clear communication, openness, and prioritizing your partner can make any job work in your marriage.