A Soul Tie Isn't Something To Take Lightly. Here's How To Know If You've Found Yours

Relationships are hard. Naturally, Gen Z has made social media a helpful tool to figure them out. For every problem you might have, whether romantic, platonic, or familial, there's likely a TikTok or Instagram post addressing it. From situationships to twin flames, the web has a whole other lexicon for identifying your relationship dynamics. One popular phrase is known as a "soul tie." 

TikToker @fatherbrittany explained in a video that soul ties are "strings of energy that link the soul to another, created during intense spiritual and emotional intensity." Soul ties can develop between friends, romantic, or sexual partners. Once formed, you may feel strongly pulled toward that person and become hyper-in-tune with their feelings and experiences. 

As professional intuitive and author of "Self-Care for Empaths" Tanya Carroll Richardson told Mind Body Green: "You could have known each other in a past life, be from the same soul family, or simply have a soul contract to meet up in this lifetime and have some type of relationship or experience together." Here's how to know if you've found yours. 

How to know if your souls are tied

Some discussions around soul ties focus on how physical intimacy bonds two people. These posts warn that engaging in sexual acts with someone could lead to a long-term connection to all of the emotions, values, and trauma that they hold. However, certified sex therapist De-Andrea Blaylock-Johnson clarified in an interview with Mind Body Green that this is not necessarily everyone's take. She mentioned that these beliefs are often based in Christianity, "to perpetuate the idea that if you have sex outside of marriage, you'll be connected to someone."

Outside of these strict religious conventions, soul ties are believed to come in a variety of different forms. TikTok user @cocomocoe informed her followers that twin flames and soulmates both fall under the category of soul ties. Further, one sign that you've found a soul tie is that when you meet, you feel like you've known them forever. You'll also likely feel an intuitive connection to them too. 

This could mean thinking of them right before they call you, or sensing when something is wrong with them when they're not present. A soul tie is someone who has impacted you deeply and whose energy has a strong influence on you even without you realizing it. 

When soul ties could be toxic

Soul ties are more of a general umbrella category for relationships. That said, they can be both good and bad. You may find yourself tied to someone you later realize is manipulative or draining. This is why it is crucial to be intentional about who you spend your time with and whom you allow into your most vulnerable moments. Forming strong bonds with another person leaves a lasting impact on you. You'll want that impact to lift you up rather than drag you down.

In addition, you should be careful with how you use the term "soul tie." Whether or not you believe in its spiritual meaning, you may have formed an unhealthy attachment to someone if you find yourself obsessing over them. Certified relationship coach Megan Weks warned Brides, "These kinds of spiritual labels can steer a person down a road toward toxic or emotionally harmful situations and cause them to remain in the situation for longer than necessary." 

It makes sense to acknowledge how deeply you feel for someone, of course, but soul-tied or not, a healthy relationship and healing from the past should always be priorities for you. And, if you feel like someone is draining your energy, it may be time to question your relationship with them.