Is Your Relationship Doomed If You Can Picture Yourself With Someone Else?

Let's face it: Not all couples are meant to last. Some people can go years into a committed relationship before realizing the romance fizzled out years ago. There are a number of signs two partners might be headed — or should consider heading — for splitsville rather than spending another year in a relationship that isn't truly fulfilling their wants and needs. It's easy to get comfortable being in a relationship that no longer serves you, especially if you live together, are married, or share children. Many can start to feel stuck in a relationship out of necessity. But just because you love the other person doesn't necessarily mean you're in love. Letting each other go to find true love might be hard, but it's well worth it in the end. The decision lies in how happy you are together. 

Wondering if you're truly happy in your relationship? You can start by paying more attention to how you feel when you're around your spouse or your reaction when their name gets brought up when you're apart. Feelings of frustration or irritation could be early signs of trouble in paradise, BetterHelp says. The same person who used to make every part of you beam with joy has turned into public enemy number one. Your growing dislike can lead to a loss of attraction to one another, which further damages the relationship. When that unattraction results in you acquiring eyes for someone else, that could be a sure sign the relationship is doomed. 

Imagining yourself with someone else is a sign of unhappiness

Being attracted to other people is normal, even when you're in a relationship with someone else, Taylor Counseling Group says. But it notes how a crush on someone else other than your partner typically develops when you're experiencing a rough patch in your relationship. When a little crush evolves into actual thoughts and fantasies about being involved with that person, that could spell trouble for the relationship you're actually in. Urges of being with someone else are pretty direct signs that you're not happy in your current relationship. 

Speaking to Elite Daily, Dr. LeslieBeth Wish, a licensed clinical psychotherapist and relationship expert, says if you've ever been around another couple and thought to yourself, "I wish my partner was like theirs,'" this is an example of not being in love with your own. It might even go beyond imagining yourself with someone else and could be full-blown imaginations of living an entirely different life. Visualizing a life for yourself without your partner could mean your spouse isn't making you happy and it might be time to take the necessary steps to identify the root of the issue.

Tips for repairing the relationship

Maybe you know you're no longer in love but are willing to fight to reignite the flame you once shared with your spouse. If this is the case, it's worth talking things out and letting your partner know how you really feel. Be ready to listen and learn what might be bothering them about you. You might even consider speaking with a counselor or therapist for personal or couples treatment. Just keep in mind that you'll have to put in the work to fix what might've broken during the relationship.

There might be past occurrences that are still impacting your relationship dynamic. Talking to work through the pain and trauma can lead to happier days ahead. Instead of daydreaming about someone else, come up with ways to show your partner how much you appreciate them. Practice complimenting each other more often. Create new memories together in the form of travel, date nights, and sharing in each other's hobbies. Don't be afraid to pack on the intimacy and public displays of affection. 

By spearheading the bonding initiatives, you're setting the perfect example for your spouse to follow. The shift in your relationship could help ward off your fantasies about other people. But if they don't, it could be time to end the relationship and go your separate ways. Your mind is clearly telling you what your heart wants, and it might be a future with someone new.