Was The Queen Mother Really Supportive Of Queen Camilla?

We may receive a commission on purchases made from links.

Queen Camilla is one of the most controversial royals around, mostly because of how she became a royal in the first place. Few will ever forget Camilla's widely-publicized affair with King Charles III, which ended up wrecking Charles' already troubled marriage to Princess Diana. Their shocking conduct was widely condemned, by the public and press alike. According to reports, Queen Elizabeth II's mother, Elizabeth, the Queen Mother was similarly unimpressed. At least initially, anyway. But then, she did something that made it seem as if she was trying to extend a helping hand to the disgraced Camilla after Diana's death — Her Majesty waved the British version of a white flag by inviting her over for tea.

The year was 1999, almost two years after Diana's untimely death, and the Queen Mother, whose influence was felt on the royal family all around, seemingly decided it was time to put the drama to bed. According to a friend of The Firm, who spoke to the New York Post at the time, she was slightly more forgiving towards Camilla because, "[She] was brought up in a... world which tolerated lovers." Another insider added, "She is more compassionate about sex than the ordinary middle-class Englishwoman." A royal aide also imparted that Her Majesty was eager "to deal with the Charles and Camilla situation."

With the dawn of Netflix's hit series, "The Crown," whispers made the rounds that she had actually conspired with Charles' great-uncle, Lord Mountbatten, to set Camilla up with her first husband, Andrew Parker Bowles, to ensure that she couldn't marry the future king. However, royal expert Sally Bedell Smith clarified to Elle that it was highly unlikely this ever happened in real life, since the Queen Mother and Lord Mountbatten were hardly close enough to orchestrate such a devious intervention.

It's hard to imagine that someone as old-school as the Queen Mother would have ever fully supported Queen Camilla after the damage she and King Charles III did to the monarchy's public image. According to some reports, she didn't initially think very highly of her son's mistress, let alone consider inviting her into the royal fold. As royal biographer Christopher Andersen revealed on Newsweek's "Royal Report" podcast, in 2022, "The Queen Mother particularly detested Camilla because she was throwing a wrench in the works. Because of Camilla, the monarchy was kind of brought to the brink of destruction." Notably, other royal biographers have shared similar stories. 

Robert Jobson detailed in his 2006 tome, "William's Princess," that Her Majesty couldn't stand Camilla and what she represented. "It was a fact that Camilla's name was not allowed to be spoken in the presence of Queen Elizabeth, the Queen Mother," the author dished. Surprisingly, Her Majesty reportedly wasn't very fond of Princess Diana either, but Camilla was at the top of her list of people she vehemently disliked, according to a 2003 column Andersen penned for Vanity Fair. What exactly changed between the Queen Mother not even wanting to hear Camilla's name to inviting her over for tea is a mystery. Unless said invite was a ploy to tell Camilla to bugger off in person, of course. 

It's not exactly a secret that Queen Elizabeth II didn't approve of King Charles III and Queen Camilla's clandestine relationship. Like the Queen Mother, she was hardly thrilled with the media storm their tryst evoked. The truth about Queen Elizabeth II's relationship with Camilla is that it was incredibly complicated, and in the late '90s, she was anything but friendly towards her. In Tom Bower's book, "Rebel King," the author chronicled one fateful meeting between the queen and her son, during which Charles asked his mother to finally make Camilla part of their family. The monarch refused. 

"[She'd had] several martinis, and to Charles's surprise she replied forcefully: She would not condone his adultery, nor forgive Camilla for not leaving Charles alone to allow his marriage to recover," Bower divulged. Her Majesty then proceeded to refer to Camilla as "that wicked woman," telling her son plainly, "I want nothing to do with her." Of course, we all know the queen's stance towards Camilla eventually softened — she even informed the British public that she would like for her to be known as the queen consort when Charles became king, during her Platinum Jubilee in 2022. 

According to Christopher Andersen's 2003 Vanity Fair column, however, Her Majesty only thawed after the Queen Mother's death. Andersen claimed that she was also a big reason why the beloved monarch didn't initially condone a union between Camilla and Charles. "While the queen had resigned herself following Diana's death to an eventual marriage between Charles and Camilla, she reportedly pledged not to sanction it so long as her mother was alive," he noted. While the Queen Mother might have been friendly towards Camilla, it appears she didn't support her marrying Charles.