Signs Kevin Costner And Christine Baumgartner Were Never Going To Last

We love a lasting celebrity romance, and for 19 years, many saw Kevin Costner and Christine Baumgartner's marriage as proof that a couple can stick it out, no matter what. But fans' hopes and dreams were left in shambles after it came to light that this power couple is going their separate ways.

The actor and designer first started dating in the 90s and eventually tied the knot in 2004. To all the world, they seemed madly in love. They were a beautiful couple, and Baumgartner was often seen supporting her husband at events and award shows. For many, the divorce seemed to come out of the blue, but the shock the world is experiencing is nothing compared to what the couple's three young kids are probably going through. Divorces can get messy, and it appears this one may be, too.

Once their divorce became public knowledge in the summer of 2023, hearts around the world shattered. "The news of them splitting up is disappointing because people feel like they know celebrities, so when they break up it almost feels like a breakup they're experiencing themselves," relationship expert and celebrity matchmaker Carmelia Ray told USA Today. She's not wrong, and while fans are trying to nurse their broken hearts, they're all wonder the same thing — what went wrong? When you take a closer look, there were some subtle red flags that indicated the couple might not stick it out. Read on to discover all the signs you might've missed.

He previously went through a divorce

Sadly, this isn't Kevin Costner's first rodeo. He was previously married to actress Cindy Silva, and when things went south between the two of them, it ended in a massive divorce settlement.

Costner and Silva were married for 16 years (you can't fault his commitment), but Costner's crazy busy schedule seemed to get in the way of the couple's happiness as the years wore on. They started out deliriously happy, and it was clear from the start that the man had fallen head-over-heels for the actress. "She was beautiful. She was sweet. She was smarter than me ... she represented everything about women that I like," Costner told People during a 1989 interview when he recounted their first date. "I was just really proud that this girl would go out with me. I wanted to show my parents," he added. Of course, looking back at this interview now is absolutely gut-wrenching. Friends of the couple expressed their disappointment over the relationship ending at the time. "It's just sad, because they were the perfect couple," one friend told People, adding that they were hopeful the two would remain friendly.

The couple's divorce settlement amounted to a whopping $80 million, which, according to Forbes, made it one of the most expensive celebrity divorces. Costner later expressed his regret over the divorce while speaking to The Hollywood Reporter. "My faith was shaken. No one wants their marriage to end, and it did," the actor said.

They broke up once before while dating

After dating for four years, Kevin Costner and Christine Baumgartner briefly broke up, breaking hearts across the globe (much like they are now). Even though the couple seemed very much in love, they were having some disagreements behind the scenes about what life would look like once they got married. Costner opened up about what caused the split in 2018 when he granted an interview with Closer Weekly. Turns out, the disagreement was about having children.

"Fear kept me from marrying Christine," the actor admitted. "[She] wanted a child, but I was afraid I couldn't be an effective father." Those in the know are aware that Costner and his ex-wife, Cindy Silva, had three children together. He then went on to have a love child with Bridget Rooney before he started dating Baumgartner. Needless to say, the actor had plenty of children already demanding his attention, but Baumgartner wanted her own, and Costner wasn't so sure he was up for it. The disagreement eventually ended in a breakup. Costner went on to explain that he realized he would lose Baumgartner for good if he continued to allow fear to rule his life. "I woke up and thought, 'Am I going to lose a beautiful woman who is willing to be with me to my very last breath because I am afraid to say yes to a child?'" he told the outlet. They resolved their issues and got married shortly after.

The couple has a 19-year age gap

Age is just a number, baby! For the longest time, Kevin Costner and Christine Baumgartner's relationship served as proof that a significant age gap doesn't necessarily have a negative impact on a relationship. And let's be real — many couples with big age gaps rarely find it to be a problem. But the 19-year age difference might be one of the things that brought down Costner and Baumgartner's marriage.

Age gaps aren't necessarily a bad thing, but there's no denying that they can have a significant impact on relationships. Oftentimes, these differences tend to become more apparent as time goes on. However, if they are addressed and handled well, relationships can survive this bump in the road. Licensed professional counselor Brandy Porche makes it clear, however, that the bigger the age gap, the better your problem-solving skills need to be. "Even if the age gap is small, like four to five years, different levels of maturity can be observed," she tells PsychCentral, adding, "When there is a significant difference in age, like 10 to 15 years or more, life experiences can be vastly different." Licensed mental health counselor GinaMarie Guarino agrees. "The bigger the gap between partners, the more likely the relationship will struggle with phase-of-life related challenges," she adds.

Taking these experts' opinions into account, it seems possible that the age gap between Costner and Baumgartner might have played a part in their split.

The couple signed a prenuptial agreement prior to getting married

Ah, prenups. They're often seen as red flags and can be quite a sticky subject when a couple starts discussing marriage. As it turns out, Kevin Costner and Christine Baumgartner signed a prenuptial agreement ahead of getting married, but it didn't really appear that shady — even though, under the circumstances, some might now say it was a sign their marriage wouldn't last.

In a court declaration, Costner explained why he opted for a prenup, and it seems to have everything to do with his divorce from Cindy Silva. "I was married before, and upon separation, I found myself without a home base and unable to live in my own home," Costner explained (via Insider), adding, "I never wanted this to happen again. Because of the nature of my work, I am frequently out of town; it is therefore particularly important to me that when I am home, I have a home to go to." Fair enough.

Costner added that he discussed all of these terms and the reasons behind them with Baumgartner. Now, however, the couple appears to be having a disagreement about who is going to live where despite the prenup. Baumgartner had 30 days to vacate the couple's home after she filed for divorce, but has failed to do so. In the meantime, she accused Costner of trying to force her and their kids out of their family home. Needless to say, as of this writing, the divorce drama is in full swing.

It was previously rumored that he was guilty of infidelity

Longtime fans will know that Kevin Costner's first marriage ended amid rumors that he was unfaithful. There were whispers that the actor was enjoying the affections of multiple women behind the scenes, and a studio source told People at the time that Costner's shenanigans were common knowledge among the crew. "I don't know anyone who doesn't know about him [and other women]," the source said. Things really started to heat up when rumors started swirling that Costner had had an affair with a hula dancer while filming for "Waterworld."

Costner's wife, Cindy Silva, had reportedly become increasingly uncomfortable with some of the intimate scenes the actor had to film for some of his movies, and it appears that Costner's association with Michelle Amaral, a hula dancer he met at a hotel, was the last straw. Costner himself once admitted that temptations are plenty in his line of work. "The temptations are pretty strong — and there's a hungry world out there waiting for you to fall. So you can't even dabble without paying a huge price," he admitted to New York City's Daily News before he and Silva called it quits (via People). "I try to conduct my life with a certain amount of dignity and discretion — but marriage is a hard, hard gig," he added.

Costner's divorce from Christine Baumgartner has brought cheating rumors back to the surface, but sources close to the actor told Page Six that it's "absolutely not true."

Kevin Costner had a very demanding work schedule

Being married to an actor can't be easy — for one, kissing other people on screen is their actual job, and their schedules tend to be downright crazy and often take them away from home for extended periods of time. Alas, it seems that Kevin Costner's crumbling marriage can, in part, once again be attributed to his crazy schedule, with sources telling People that the actor's work obligations started to overshadow his obligations to his family. "At times, his career has taken precedence over his home life," the source revealed, adding, "Kevin hasn't been home very much for quite some time due to filming, the popularity of 'Yellowstone', and the time necessary for his other projects. He has been in demand." While being an in-demand actor in Hollywood is anyone's dream, Costner's had to pay dearly for his popularity.

A family source told the outlet that Baumgartner hadn't been happy in her marriage for a while. Because Costner was away filming for weeks on end, he missed plenty of quality family time as a result. This became an issue and tensions only grew as Costner's schedule continued to become increasingly crazy. "Christine doesn't want him to throw himself into another project. He has been obsessed with filming 'Horizon' since last year. She wasn't happy about it," the source divulged.

If we had to guess, Baumgartner telling Costner to lay off some projects probably didn't go down all that well.

He was hesitant to star in Yellowstone because it would take him away from home

It appears Kevin Costner had some reservations about the effect his jam-packed schedule might have on his family life before he accepted a part in "Yellowstone." Since news of the divorce has gone public, several sources have come out of the woodwork, telling Us Weekly that Costner had a hard time making a decision about joining the hit show's cast.

"He was on the fence about doing the show from the beginning. He had to be convinced to do the project," one source revealed. "There were months of discussions with Kevin and his family before he did it. He didn't want [to] do the show without their input," they added. Part of Costner's hesitation about the project was due to its location. He and his family lived in California, and he'd need to travel to Utah and Montana to film for "Yellowstone." This meant he'd have to spend plenty of time away from his family.

Sources claim that Costner's reps had tried to convince the powers that be to film some of the show's scenes in California so he could cut down on traveling, but it didn't pan out. Clearly, the actor was worried about the effect his time away from home might have on his marriage, so the couple's problems might have been a long time coming, especially since sources claim Baumgartner was unhappy with all the time he spent away from home.

She reportedly got too close to the couple's neighbor

While most people know that Kevin Costner had been accused of cheating on his ex-wife Cindy Silva, some outlets have reported that Christine Baumgartner might have had a wandering eye, as well.

It all started when businessman Daniel Starr moved into the Costners' guest house. According to sources who spoke to The Sun, Daniel became fast friends with the Costners and their kids, but his friendship with Baumgartner, in particular, became problematic later on. "Chris and Daniel hung out a lot. She would come into his house almost daily," one source claimed. "But there was a fallout and Kevin got wind of it. There was a row between him and Daniel and things escalated from there," the source added.

The so-called fallout between Baumgartner and Starr was, sources claim, due to "Daniel's attitude towards their friendship." What exactly was problematic about his attitude is not clear — but the source seems to imply that he was hellbent on keeping things friendly while Baumgartner wanted something more. Regardless, Costner confronted Starr about the disagreement he had with his wife and the couple's relationship with Starr instantly soured. Baumgartner and Costner wanted Starr to vacate the premises, but his lease wasn't up yet, so he insisted on staying. Lawyers got involved, and things got a little ugly. Starr denies that he was involved with Baumgartner, and told TMZ exactly that when he was questioned about their relationship.

There are rumors that she told him to quit Yellowstone

Kevin Costner's shocking exit from "Yellowstone" sent fans into a meltdown. The actor reportedly quit the show amid various scheduling challenges and growing tensions between him and his co-star Taylor Sheridan. A source told the New York Post that the latter is really to blame for Costner's exit. And yet, Christine Baumgartner dropped quite the bombshell (likely without realizing it) when she stated in court documents that she had no hand in Kevin Costner's decision to end his time on "Yellowstone." 

This raised some eyebrows because media outlets weren't exactly running with the story that she was behind it. Her denial, however, made many wonder if she was indeed involved in some way. Her statement went on to accuse the actor of launching "public attacks" on her. "I believe they are meant to pressure me to move out without a temporary child support agreement in place," Baumgartner said in her statement (via ET).

Sources told Us Weekly that the show's scheduling mess took its toll on the couple's marriage. "Christine wasn't happy with 'Yellowstone's' schedule delays because it caused him to miss so much time with his family," one source claimed, adding that it played a big part in the breakdown of the couple's marriage. Other sources told People that Costner's split from his wife and his exit from the show had nothing to do with each other. Whether that's the truth remains to be seen.

They were already separated before filing for divorce

Those in the loop probably saw Kevin Costner and Christine Baumgartner's divorce coming a mile away, and as it turns out, the actor was suspecting that his marriage was about to end for good. The couple officially separated on April 11, 2023, and Costner was served with divorce papers in early May. Sources told The Sun that the actor planned on initiating the divorce and that he wanted to keep it as drama-free as possible, but Baumgartner had other plans. "Kevin was so shocked," one source said, adding, "Christine has since made him look terrible, and has continued to do so."

Another source told People that Costner didn't want the divorce, but that he had been aware that Baumgartner was no longer happy in their marriage for quite some time. "[I]f he could change the situation, he would," another source added.

It appears Costner's desire for a clean break won't be possible, given the less-than-friendly back and forth between him and Baumgartner since news of the divorce became public. It appears that the couple's disagreement centered around where Baumgartner and the kids need to live now that the couple's marriage is being dissolved, but the Independent reports that Baumgartner has vacated their family home after a lengthy debate and various negotiations regarding child support. As for where she and her children now reside remains unclear. This might signal an end to all the drama; for now, at least.