Tragic Details About Diane Lane

The following article mentions domestic violence allegations and addiction.

Diane Lane has spent most of her life in the limelight, landing her first major lead role in the 1979 film "A Little Romance" at just 13 years old. Her timeless appeal and range as an actor have made her a Hollywood staple. One might argue her most memorable role is as Connie Sumner, a married woman involved in an erotic affair, in the 2002 steamy romance "Unfaithful." On the flip side, DC fans likely know her as Martha Kent from "Man of Steel." Her other popular credits include "The Outsiders," "Under the Tuscan Sun," and Disney's "Inside Out." For her parts in these films and others, the actor has won 17 awards and received 33 nominations throughout her career. Among her nominations were those for Oscar, Golden Globe, and Emmy Awards.

Though she has built an enduring career and impressive net worth, Lane has experienced her fair share of challenges and misfortune over the years. While she often stuns on red carpets and expertly brings her characters to life, she's had many off-camera experiences that haven't been nearly as glamorous. From feuding parents to industry weirdos, the evolution of Diane Lane's life has been dotted with difficulty, heartbreak, and tragedy dating back to her infancy. 

On January 22, 1965, Diane Lane was born to Colleen Farrington, a singer and former Playboy model, and Burt Lane, a drama coach, New York City. Farrington and Burt separated when their daughter was only 13 days old and divorced shortly after. When Diane was 6 years old, she ended up in her father's custody after her mother moved to Georgia. Burt worked as a cab driver at the time, and the two moved around a lot, living in extended-stay hotels. Burt valued the time they spent together, telling People in 1989, "She was this angelic, perfect child." Diane also began to dip her foot in acting at this time, starring in a New York production of "Medea."

Burt's outlook on life at that time seemed a bit brighter than Diane's. The challenge of having parents at odds with each other since birth is something that still sticks with her as an adult. "Childhood can feel as though we are living for our parents," she shared in a 2017 video for Elle. "They always planned on sharing me parentally, but I never saw them as a couple."

Diane Lane began landing acting gigs when she was only in grade school, and according to Burt Lane, it was all because he was looking for someone to keep an eye on her. "No career was ever planned for Diane. This was just better than daycare," he told People in 1989.  

When she was 6 years old, Diane joined an experimental theater group called La MaMa. Even though she was only at grade school at the time, her mom and dad allowed her to go on a world tour with the group — and neither parent joined her on the road. During the tour, she was in the care of the other actors, most of whom were in their 20s. "I was always just the little kid in the troupe. They kept me on, which was sweet!" she told the Savannah Morning News. While the other members of the cast looked out for her, she was still around drug use, depictions of nudity and violence on the stage and screen, and more. Understandably, this was all a lot to take on at such a formative time, and the experience had a lasting impact on Diane. "Oh yeah, it definitely got me a seat in therapy," she told The Guardian. Diane was a part of the company for six years. 

In that same interview with The Guardian, Diane considered whether or not she would have allowed her own daughter, Eleanor Lambert, to take a similar venture at such a young age. "When I was the mother of a seven-year-old, there was no way I was going to put her on a plane and send her away. Phones and postcards, that's what we had," Diane said. 

At age 15, Diane Lane declared her independence from her father and ran away to Los Angeles for a week with "Blue Lagoon" actor Christopher Atkins. "We were just puppies," she told People in 1989. "It was reckless behavior that comes from having too much independence too young." When she returned to the East Coast, Diane kept her distance from her father and moved in with a friend. Due to her already lucrative acting career, Diane was able to fund her rebellion and pay rent to her friend's family.

Burt Lane, who was also serving as his daughter's manager at the time, reflected on this tumultuous period in the aforementioned People interview. "She had the life experience of people three times her age, and she wanted that acknowledged," he stated. "When Diane made her exits, she made them for real. She had her own money and followed her own schedules. All kids rebel in some way, but Diane was capable of carrying out her plans. And she did." 

In 1981, Colleen Farrington decided she wanted Diane Lane to leave New York City and live with her. So, one day, Farrington happened upon her daughter and persuaded her to get in a car. That's when things took a turn. "[W]hen I got into the car, there was a man and no handles on the door," Diane recalled to People. Farrington then drove Lane all the way to her home in Augusta, Georgia. "All she wanted to do was talk to me, but I was too busy freaking out because she was driving me to Georgia against my will," Diane said. Her father, Burt Lane, fought in court against Farrington for the teen's return to New York and won.

The "ugly" incident severely strained the actor's relationship with her mother, whom she didn't speak to for three years after. In the previously mentioned Elle interview, Diane said, "I had the experience of actually being fought over. It was really tricky to live between two strong, passionate, interesting, fiery parents who are not united in any way." Although the two mended things, it's clear that her parents' complicated and fraught dynamic negatively impacted her own relationships with them as well.

In addition to navigating the family drama, balancing her acting career and education became a challenge for Diane Lane. Throughout the late '70s and early '80s, she landed roles on TV shows, in movies, and in theater productions. She told the Observer in 2015, "It always sounds quite desirable to be fought over, but it was really unpleasant at the time — you feel so apologetic, like you'd done something wrong just by showing up." 

When she was still in high school, Lane was invited to be in an Off-Broadway production of Elizabeth Swados' musical "Runaways." The demands of the rehearsal schedule caught up with her quickly, and she ended up skipping class to try to catch up on her sleep. "I'd go to the bathroom, into the handicapped stall, and go to sleep on the floor. ... The play every night, school every day–it just became more than my little body could do. I'd finally had enough," she told Esquire in 2007. "The school put me on notice that they were going to kick me out if I didn't get my grades up. I told my dad I didn't want to be an actress anymore." Of course, she ultimately did stick with acting, and that resulted in her getting kicked out of Hunter College High School. When "Runaways" went to Broadway, Lane stepped away from the show to star in "A Little Romance."

We've all heard stories about the horrible things that can happen behind the scenes in Hollywood. As it turns out, Diane Lane has had some shady experiences of her own with higher-ups in the industry. Early on in her career, a group of company executives showed up to a movie set they weren't involved with on the day she'd be taking off her clothes. "I was like, really? You've got to be kidding me. This can't be an accident. They were all lined up in the back. That's messed up, that shouldn't happen to somebody," she told The Guardian in a 2024 interview. "Be a professional and not let it get under my skin. I've had other executives who timed it so that they were visiting the set on the day when you're in your robe or what have you. Is that a coincidence? I wonder."

Despite these uncomfortable situations, Lane has managed to avoid any direct harassment during the span of her decades-long career. She recalled strategically steering clear of one particular man, whom she did not name, at industry parties. "I was a very street-savvy kid. I knew who to give a wide berth to," she noted. Lane also explained that she learned to compartmentalize different areas of her life at an early age. "I knew to not let it in to myself. It's a skill I developed quickly, because I had to," she said. 

Diane Lane met her first husband, French actor Christopher Lambert, in 1984, but their romantic relationship wouldn't start for another two years. They married in October 1988 in Santa Fe, New Mexico, and welcomed their daughter, Eleanor Lambert, in 1993. 

By 1994, however, Lane and Christopher's marriage was over. During a 2007 interview with Esquire, Lane reflected on the history of her relationship with Christopher and why it fell apart, implying that she recognized that the foundation was shaky from the start. "It wasn't love and it wasn't lust, but it was sure something," she said. "I used to joke with Christopher, 'I'm marrying you for all the things that I'm avoiding, not for what I'm getting.'" She also noted that they spent a significant time apart due to their respective work schedules, and that was not good for their relationship. "I was mostly celibate when I was married because he was gone all the time. I felt like the nun in heat waiting for the guy on the stallion to take me off and make a woman of me. I just wanted to belong to somebody and have somebody belong to me in the old-fashioned way," she said. "In hindsight, I call myself a rock bleeder; I found the absolutely least likely person on the planet Earth to give me what I needed."

2002's "Unfaithful" may have been a boon for Diane Lane's career — it earned her an Oscar nomination, for one thing — but it did take a major toll on her neck. The rather erotic and beloved film, which also starred Richard Gere, who played Lane's character's husband, and Olivier Martinez, her on-screen side piece, included several notable sex scenes. One of the scenes featuring Lane and Martinez's characters required so many takes that the former ended up sustaining a lasting injury.

"I herniated my neck during the kissing scene [with Olivier Martinez]," Lane told Yahoo! Entertainment. "We must've done like 50 takes. So my neck finally went out." The actor noted in the 2017 interview that she was still tending to the injury with a chiropractor, over a decade after the film's release. Lane likely experiences radiating pain because a neck disc hernia often presses on spinal nerves. "There's one scene, you see me in the film ... I'm just doing the scene laying down because that's all I could do at that point. I could just lay down and lean over and talk to him and say the lines. And at that point, they took me to the hospital and got me an MRI."

In 2004, Diane Lane and fellow actor Josh Brolin  tied the knot on the latter's property in San Luis Obispo, California. That same year, Lane called the police on Brolin for allegedly hitting her. The "Weapons" star was arrested for spousal battery and released after posting $20,000 bail. Kelly Bush, a spokeswoman for the couple, told People, "Diane did not want to press charges and asked them not to arrest him, but in cases involving the possibility of any physical contact, the police have to arrest first, ask questions later." Bush said that the couple was "embarrassed" about how the incident escalated.

Charges against Brolin were dropped. In a 2018 interview with The New York Times, he looked back on the events leading up to his arrest. "God, I've never been so careful with my words," he said. "And there's no reason for me to be other than there's no explaining it. ... The only person who can explain that would be Diane [Lane], and she's chosen not to, so I'm O.K. with that."

Brolin also reflected on how much he cared for both Lane and her daughter, but unfortunately was not the husband or parent he wanted to be during the marriage. "It just wasn't attainable, and in that hero mentality, you get exhausted, and then when you get exhausted, you get resentful, and then all that stuff comes out," he said. "So I feel bad that I didn't have the presence of mind or the maturity or whatever to understand that early on." Diane has not spoken publicly about what happened the night Brolin was arrested.

Despite their push through the 2004 domestic incident, Diane Lane and Josh Brolin ended their vow to forever in February 2013. Reps for the couple told People, "They've been separated for several months. This was a hard decision for both of them to make. They were together for 11 years, the relationship just ran its course." Reps who spoke with Us Weekly said that the split was mutual and occurred without animosity.

About two months before the divorce announcement, Brolin was arrested on New Year's Eve in 2012 for public intoxication. He was released the next day without charges. The "No Country for Old Men" actor went to rehab several months later and has been sober ever since.

In the previously mentioned New York Times interview, Brolin reflected on his struggles with addiction. "There's something that happens to me when I drink that all moral code disappears," he said. "I want to live more drunk. I want to live drunkenly. I just don't want to take the drink." Diane Lane, who was 48 at the time, is the one who filed for divorce, citing "irreconcilable differences" as the reason for the split. She signed the documents on Valentine's Day.

In 2015, Diane Lane's mother, Colleen Farrington, died at 79 years old. Lane credits her mother for being able to play her role in FX's limited series "Feud: Capote vs. The Swans" so well. "I channeled a lot of my mother's strength to be able to pull off what was asked of me in this writing, because it was tough stuff," she told Variety about embodying Slim Keith. Diane's father, Burt Lane, died from cancer in February 2002. Anticipating his death before the May release of "Unfaithful," the actor arranged a special screening for the roughly edited version of the film. She told CBS News, "You know, when my Dad saw it — it wasn't long before he died — he said, 'You rang the bell.'" Diane earned an Oscar nomination for the role in the film, a testament to her father's professional judgment. Though the star had complicated relationships with her parents, she still misses them and grieves the loss. In a 2017 Elle interview, Diane said, "I wish they were [here]. I wish I could share my success with them."

Despite life's troubles, Diane, like many of us, continues to smile for the cameras. Most recently, she made an appearance at the star-studded 2025 Academy Museum Gala. The rare cameo took place just days ahead of the release of her latest project, "Anniversary," which debuted in theaters on October 29.

If you or anyone you know needs help with addiction issues, or is dealing with domestic abuse, please contact the resources below:

• Visit the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website or contact SAMHSA's National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357).
• Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1−800−799−7233. You can also find more information, resources, and support at their website.