The Best Relationship Advice From Tiktok Dating Coach Kirstie Taylor
When you're having dating or relationship problems, getting an outside perspective can be helpful, not to mention emotionally satisfying. Sometimes, we're too close to a situation to objectively assess both our own actions and our partner's without it turning into a blame game. Normally, our first stop is our friends or family, but seeking advice from someone completely removed from both parties is often the best way to figure out how to resolve the issue, and when's the right time to move on. That's where a dating coach comes in handy.
Per Bustle, dating coaches provide you with a strong emotional support system, while equipping you with techniques to overcome relationship anxieties. Kirstie Taylor, TikTok's favorite dating coach and author of "What I Wish I Knew About Love" (via Clothes & Water), consistently shares poignant relationship advice on the social sharing app. With 171,400 followers, 4 million likes and counting (via Social Tracker), Taylor's honest advice on coping with dating issues including ghosting, anxious attachment and creating healthy boundaries is universal and motivational.
One area of dating that Taylor has covered extensively in videos is toxic relationship habits. If you've ever been in a toxic relationship before, you understand the lasting impact it can have on you, as well as the time and effort it takes to grow and move on from the experience. True to her brand, the dating coach tackled this topic and shared advice that will change how you see future relationships.
Kirstie Taylor breaks down the difference between passion and a healthy relationship
Kirstie Taylor regular answers dating and relationship questions from her followers. In one powerful TikTok video, Taylor shared that she was asked whether real love is boring. What she had to say launched an important conversation on healthy relationships. She starts her advice off by asking "What is your definition of boring?" before diving deeper and rotating through a series of counter, clarifying questions: "Is it someone who never fights with you? Is it someone who never makes you question their love? Or is it someone that you're not attracted to? Is it someone that you don't feel chemistry with?"
In the video, Taylor then goes on to explain why people mistake comfort in a relationship with boredom, and how misconceptions on chemistry and passion contribute to that. "Often, people confuse feeling triggered as this intense passion and chemistry so that when they finally get into a healthy relationship, it just feels totally wrong," she explained. "So if you're attracted to someone and you enjoy dating them, I'd ask yourself if this is boredom that you're feeling or just the awkward transition into dating someone who's finally emotionally healthy?"
Brightside agrees that being in a stable relationship where you're not constantly fighting or involved in drama isn't a sign that the chemistry is gone. It's a shift from how society wires us to think that having constant, serious relationship conflicts are proof of passion.