Dating Trends To Look Out For In 2024
As 2023 comes to a close, we are all looking over the horizon of New Year's toward 2024 — what will the new year hold for us all?
Well, in the world of dating, next year is set to be filled with new trends. Dating trends may seem like jargon created by TikTok, but being aware of patterns can actually be a great way to spot red flags and ensure your relationships are as healthy as possible.
In 2023, we saw trends like cloaking, thawing, wanderlove, and fizzling cropping up in the dating scene. What's next? Well, dating experts from Bumble and Plenty of Fish, among others, have predicted a number of patterns that we can all expect to see among singletons in the new year. From dating with rizz-colored glasses to looking for Ken-ergy to a newfound appreciation for our dates' values, there's a whole lot to look forward to (and, sometimes, to dread). So, without further ado, let's get into the biggest dating trends to look out for in 2024.
Rizz colored glasses
We've all heard of rose-tinted glasses — those metaphorical glasses we put on to see the world with a touch of optimism and, well, rosiness. Introducing rizz-colored glasses. These are the metaphorical glasses we wear during dates that blind us to everything but "rizz." A quick lesson in Gen Z slang: Rizz refers to someone's charismatic pull. "Rizz actually comes from the word charisma, where in southern Baltimore they've started to shorten it to 'rizzma' (the noun replacing charisma) and to 'rizz' (the action of showing charisma)," reads the Urban Dictionary definition.
Next year, dating experts at Plenty of Fish predict that many of us will struggle to see past our dates' rizz — in other words, many of us may be drawn in by charisma, thus ignoring potential red flags. In fact, according to a Plenty of Fish survey, 52% of us find rizz attractive.
As dating expert Jessica Alderson told Glamour U.K., "People with rizz have excellent communication and persuasion skills. ... These individuals know exactly what to do and say to draw others in, and this is a powerful tool in the dating world." However, while this can be charming, it can also be dangerous. "Without a genuine understanding of each other's true selves, the connection will remain superficial," she said. Sometimes, you might even find it hard to see the red flags lurking behind all that rizz.
Betterment burnout
For the last few years, we've all been striving to be the best versions of ourselves. We've invested in self-care. We've hustled in side gigs. We've set ourselves goals. To be honest, a lot of us are getting pretty tired of always trying to be the "best." In fact, a lot of people are reaching a state of "betterment burnout."
The term was coined by dating app Bumble, who noticed that a number of singles are starting to fight that constant self-improvement. As more and more of us realize that there's no such thing as the "best" version of ourselves, we'll see a movement of singles who are embracing themselves just as they are. ("Bridget Jones" flashback, anyone?)
In fact, according to Bumble, 40% of women have declared they will "only date people who won't try to change them." Now that's a trend we can get behind.
Ken-ergy
"Can you feel the Ken-ergy?" We definitely can — and it looks like a lot of singles will be hoping to feel it next year. According to Bumble, a lot of men were actually inspired by Ryan Gosling's Ken in Greta Gerwig's "Barbie" movie and other films. Some of them are even changing their approach to dating because of it. Bumble found that 25% of men have become more vulnerable and honest while dating.
"I think it's important to see that men are talking about their emotions and their feelings — we know men are very vulnerable to a lot of mental health issues, but feeling like they can't talk about it can make things worse," Dr. Caroline West, Bumble's sex and relationships expert, told indy100 of the phenomenon. Even though Ken spent most of the film embracing the power dynamics created by the patriarchy, the film itself flips gender dynamics on their head to show the benefits of a gender-equal society. "I think that we're a lot more open to talking about things like toxic masculinity and how patriarchy actually really harms men," West said.
Let's just hope we don't have to visit any Mojo Dojo Casa Houses next year.
PMI (premature intimacy)
Next year, expect to see a lot of intimacy — the uncomfortable kind. According to a Plenty of Fish survey, 65% of singles have experienced premature oversharing in relationships. In other words, people have gotten into a habit of being too intimate a little too quickly.
Dating expert Jessica Alderson told Stylist that PMI in the dating world can also include premature physical intimacy. As she went on to explain, a lot of people are feeling the need to overshare because they believe it will actually help them progress the relationship. "They may believe that by being vulnerable and sharing personal information in the early stages of dating, their date will see them as more desirable or trustworthy," she said.
However, PMI can also lead to the premature end of a relationship. It can lead to feelings of being overwhelmed and even discomfort. If you notice PMI happening to you, don't be afraid to call it out. "If someone is oversharing or being prematurely intimate with you, it's important to communicate your discomfort or lack of readiness for that level of intimacy," she said.
Groundhog Day-ting
If you've seen the 1993 Bill Murray classic "Groundhog Day," you'll know the premise — a man finds himself trapped in a time loop. Every day, he wakes up and finds himself living the same day over and over again. In 2024, we can expect to see "Groundhog Day" time loops entering the dating world.
According to a survey from Plenty of Fish and single British users, "Groundhog Day-ting" is set to be one of next year's biggest trends. The trend will see people returning to the same date locations again and again. Why? Well, according to their survey, over three-quarters of people like to head back to the same spot as it removes some of the stress of a first date, while also offering predictability in terms of the bill.
We all have a favorite restaurant or bar — so it makes sense that we might go there for all of our first dates. Let's just hope the servers don't start recognizing us!
A focus on values
What makes a good match? Is it attraction? Is it chemistry? Or is it shared values? Even though the old saying may suggest that "opposites attract," next year, most people won't be looking for their opposite.
According to Bumble's predictions, a lot of people will be prioritizing values when it comes to their dating lives. More than ever, people are looking for partners who share political and social beliefs. In fact, 33% of people claim to be less likely to date someone who isn't aware of social issues.
According to studies, this approach to dating does make sense. One 2022 study published in Nature Human Behavior found that, on average, long-term partners share up to 89% of their traits, including deep values. As Jared Balbona, co-author of the paper told CNBC, "There are very few traits where opposites actually do attract." Sounds like we should all give value-based dating a go next year!
Crypt-ick
Let's face it — finance bros can be pretty dull. Sure, they can take us to fancy restaurants, but when they spend the entirety of dinner waxing lyrical about the stock market or non fungible tokens, most of us may find ourselves losing interest quickly.
According to Plenty of Fish, in 2024, more people than ever will be rejecting the finance bros — it's a trend they're calling "crypt-ick." As Plenty of Fish put it, "Crypto bros, take note — nearly 33% of singles have reported experiencing the 'crypt-ick.'"
The disinterest in dating finance bros has been building for some time. In fact, way back in 2017, The New Yorker published a first-person story about someone who tried dating a finance bro — and regretted it. "They put their work calls on speaker when you're hanging out," joked the writer. "This may be foreplay. You will never be sure." Yikes, no thank you!
Exploring age gap relationships
Leonardo DiCaprio, 2024 could be your year! According to Bumble's research, a lot of singles are increasingly interested in exploring age gap relationships. In fact, out of the people they surveyed, 63% claimed that an age difference doesn't make a big difference in whether or not they date someone. Plus, 59% of women said that they would consider dating a younger person.
According to Toby Ingham, a psychotherapist, this might not be a terrible thing. "There used to be an idea that, as a rule of thumb, half your age plus seven was the guide to the younger age a partner should be," he said to Metro. "That may now be outdated. ... Now, the [societal] accent being on inclusivity and normalizing difference might eradicate such ideas."
As Dr. Caroline West, a sex and relationship expert, explained to indy100, exploring greater age gaps might open you up to new possibilities: "When you tear up that rule book and allow yourself to date people that you may not have dated before, you can have new experiences and actually find someone who is right for you, rather than someone trying to fit this tiny little box that you may have put them in before."
Contra-dating
Sometimes, contradictions can be a good thing — especially in the dating world. According to Plenty of Fish, more of us will be experimenting with contradictions in the year to come — it's a trend they've dubbed "contra-dating." Essentially, this will see people forcing themselves to contradict their own habits — this might mean dating someone you wouldn't normally date, or simply looking outside of your usual type. Up to 36% of people are interested in giving this a try next year.
A lot of experts agree that dating outside of your type can be a great way to expand your dating horizons. Tanya Dmitrieva, a certified sex therapist, explained to Verywell Mind that you might actually be in a pattern of choosing toxic partners. "The real issue is why some people choose toxic partners with unhealthy attachment styles and start relationships with them," she said. "This pattern can limit our ability to have healthy relationships." She recommended trying to date someone a little different to help you break out of the cycle.
Plus, it simply gives us a better chance of meeting someone great. As psychologist Dr. Shannon Curry told Brides, "Statistically speaking, if we reduce the dating pool to singles who meet strict physical and monetary criteria, our odds of meeting someone who also possesses the personality traits that are conducive to lasting happiness significantly decrease."
Rejecting milestones
A lot of us have the tendency to look at our lives as a series of milestones. We imagine we'll graduate, get a job, get married, have kids, and, eventually retire. The same sort of timeline-based thinking happens in our dating lives, too. You might imagine your first kiss, your first anniversary, the proposal, and marriage all happening at specific times in the relationship. However, this kind of thinking might be going out of fashion.
In 2024, Bumble predicts that many people will reject traditional timelines in their dating lives and start going at their own pace. According to their research, a third of women no longer want to follow specific dating timelines.
"More women are placing themselves at the center of their lives in such a radical way — from re-evaluating if and when they want to become mothers to their relationships with work," said Bumble's Caroline West to Stylist, adding, "If you're no longer limited by the idea that you have to be married with two kids by the time you're 30, then life's opportunities have opened up. Instead, you could choose to spend a year in a new city or date someone unexpected."
F.O.S.O. (Fear of starting over)
Deciding to leave a partner can be difficult — especially if you've been together for a long time. One of the reasons why people often avoid breaking up with a partner is the fear of having to start all over again with someone new — sure, the relationship may not be perfect, but at least it's there and it's established. Plenty of Fish has highlighted the fear of starting over, or F.O.S.O., as one of the big trends to look out for next year.
If you find yourself shying away from a breakup because of your fear of starting all over again, try to push through that fear and do what's best for you.
"So many people are happy to maintain the status quo living in unfulfilled, unhappy, and sometimes broken relationships, especially when children or finances are involved," said sex and relationship expert Gillian Myhill to Stylist of the trend. "But often, it's better to be happy alone than unhappy together."
Week Day-ting
Apparently, the tradition of dating on a Friday or Saturday is over — in 2024, it will be all about the weekday dates. In fact, according to Plenty of Fish, some people will be saying no to weekend dates altogether. "Week Day-ting" is "arranging dates on weeknights only, so you don't waste your weekends if they aren't a success," the dating app wrote.
We are intrigued. After all, there's nothing quite as crushing as realizing you've wasted a precious Saturday evening on a dud of a date. As dating expert Hayley Quinn told Metro, "Aim for a Wednesday or Thursday evening, or a Sunday brunch. Friday or Saturday nights are likely to be saved for socializing with friends and not seen as worth spending on a first date."
You could even take week day-ting one step further and try Wednesday-ting — only dating on Wednesdays. According to research, it's the best night of the week for a date.
Reno-dating
As any homeowner knows, we all need to do some upkeep on our houses to keep them in good shape. And sometimes, we might even want to do a more serious renovation to really spruce the place up. What if we applied the same concept to our relationships?
Introducing reno-dating, one of Plenty of Fish's 2024 dating trends. The concept is "a focus on renewing and refreshing your dating approach and/or goals, in the same way you would your home," as the app wrote. You could also think of it as relationship maintenance. Just like your home may start to show signs of mold and wear and tear if it's not properly maintained, your relationship may start to suffer if it's not also maintained.
As psychologist Gary W. Lewandowski wrote for Psychology Today, there are a few ways to do relationship maintenance right. Notice if you feel bored — this is probably a sign you need to do some reno-dating. Also, be sure to plan date nights with your partner — even if you've been together for years. Finally, notice the good stuff. "Be more intentional about noticing your relationship's bright spots," he wrote. "Not only will you appreciate your partner more, but you can use what's going well to help improve less bright areas."