The Jarring Five-Word Message That Revealed An HGTV Star's Husband Was Having An Affair

Just about everyone who goes through a divorce handles and processes it differently, and perhaps no group exemplifies this better than the many stars of HGTV. Some, like "Unsellable Houses" co-host Leslie Davis, like to keep things hush-hush. On the other side of the coin, you have someone like "Flip or Flop" star Christina Haack, whose messy divorce from Josh Hall practically played out on television. Somewhere in the middle is Jen Hatmaker, host of "My Big Family Renovation", who's spoken candidly about what went on behind closed doors and how it affected her. On that note, one of the most heartbreaking revelations Jen shared is the jarring way she found out her husband and HGTV co-host Brandon Hatmaker was cheating on her, which triggered their split.

Jen announced her divorce from Brandon in a September 2020 Instagram post. At the time, she kept the circumstances of their breakup close to the vest, though made it clear this was a sudden development that hit her hard. She eventually spilled the tea in her September 2025 memoir "Awake," explaining that it was in July 2020 that she discovered her husband's affair. And get this: she only found out because, allegedly, he was using voice-to-text to message his mistress while she was sleeping in bed next to him. Bad with technology or actively trying to get caught? You be the judge.

Regardless, as Jen recalls, she woke up to the sound of the conversation that irretrievably upended her family. "I hear five whispered words not meant for me: 'I just can't quit you.' My husband of 26 years is voice-texting his girlfriend next to me in our bed. It's the end of my life as I know it," she wrote (via People).

When we say the discovery of husband Brandon Hatmaker's affair changed everything for Jen Hatmaker, we mean it. In her book, she recalls how that fateful night was the last they spent together, as she kicked him out of the house early the next morning. As for why she waited to tell her side of the story in detail, she explained that while the divorce and upheaval of her family dynamic were obviously painful for her, she wanted to make sure he wasn't needlessly making things more difficult for her children, as well.

Regarding that difficulty, Jen had previously discussed some of the lesser-talked-about nuances of divorce during a February 2022 episode of "Elephants in the Room", a sub-series of her "For the Love" podcast. More specifically, she explained how painful divorce can be for the person who initiated it, even if they were completely justified in doing so. "No matter what precipitated the breakup of your marriage, it's traumatizing, okay? Even if you made the choice. Even if you made the good and the right choice," she said, adding, "There's so much personal and societal impact, and it's real. And so, it's normal and even healthy to sort of be reeling after a divorce, no matter what brought you to that place."

For his part, Brandon discussed the night his voice-texting revealed his cheating in a Substack post he made the same day the excerpt about the incident from Jen's book was released. He described it as "the lowest moment of my life," adding that he'd been working to atone for his mistakes since. He also claimed that his and Jen's marriage had been going downhill for some time prior to his affair.