The Feud Between King Charles And Princess Diana's Brother Goes Way Back

King Charles III and Charles Spencer, 9th Earl Spencer, don't get along — and now the whole world knows it. Tensions between the two men rose shortly after the earl's older sister, Princess Diana, married then-Prince Charles back in 1981. The truth about Charles and Diana's marriage is that it was not a happy one. As Earl Spencer watched his sister suffer throughout her relationship with Charles, resentment started to build, and the longstanding relationship between the House of Windsor and the House of Spencer began to fall apart.

In recent history, Spencer's ancestors were actually quite close to the king's. His father — John Spencer, 8th Earl Spencer — was close to Queen Elizabeth II. After the current Earl Spencer's birth, his father asked the late queen to be his son's godmother, and she agreed. The earl's maternal grandmother, Ruth Roche, Baroness Fermoy, had been a lady-in-waiting to Queen Elizabeth, The Queen Mother. Sadly, though, what began as a close bond between two families quietly eroded as Diana and Charles' marriage turned sour. The cruel comments that Charles made about Diana throughout her lifetime angered Spencer. When it came time to plan Diana's funeral, the two men engaged in an unforgettable argument. In 2026, the king and the earl found themselves, once again, at war. This time, they battled over their grief, their integrity, and Diana's memory. 

King Charles III's disastrous marriage to Princess Diana led to a whole lot of heartbreak — a fact that Charles Spencer, 9th Earl Spencer, understood better than most. Because Princess Diana had a solid relationship with her brother, she was able to confide in him about the state of her tumultuous marriage. One of the princess' biggest confessions, according to Earl Spencer's "Swan Song: Diana, My Sister," was that Charles had body shamed his bride-to-be in the days leading up to their wedding. In an excerpt of the book (via the Daily Mail), Earl Spencer wrote, "Her insecurity was increased a few days after the engagement announcement when Prince Charles had squeezed her waist and said, 'Oh, a bit chubby here, aren't we?'"

Apparently, Diana's weight was not the only thing that Charles liked to criticize. According to the earl, Charles also disliked Diana's lack of life experience. At the time that they were wed in 1981, Charles was 32 years old. Diana, meanwhile, had turned 20 just days before the ceremony. Throughout most of their engagement, she had been only 19. Earl Spencer wrote, "She told me he had married a 20-year-old but seemed always to wish she was nearer to 35, in character and outlook." Due to Charles' frequent expressions of dissatisfaction with Diana, the earl came to develop negative feelings toward him.

The feud between King Charles III and Charles Spencer, 9th Earl Spencer, only grew throughout the 1990s. By the time of Diana's tragic passing in 1997, tensions had already been simmering between Charles and Earl Spencer for years. According to the earl's book, "Swan Song: Diana, My Sister," things started to go badly in earnest in 1992. At the time, Earl Spencer and Diana were mourning the death of their father — John Spencer, 8th Earl Spencer. Charles attended the funeral and, according to the king's then-brother-in-law, a very crude interaction took place.

In an excerpt of his book (via the Daily Mail), Earl Spencer claimed that Charles only had inappropriately positive things to say about his father's death. "You're just so lucky — you know, inheriting [your earldom] when you're so young! You're inheriting this place in your 20s." Charles allegedly told him. Apparently, the then-Prince of Wales went on to note that he himself was not close to inheriting the throne. "I mean, I'm 43 [years old] ... and I employ 50 people ... but my parents insist on treating me like — like a child!" Charles reportedly said. At the time, Earl Spencer felt that these comments reflected a certain sense of callousness. In the eyes of Diana's brother, Charles had felt nothing over the death of his father-in-law — other than envy over the speedy inheritance of titles. 

When Princess Diana died in 1997, tensions between King Charles III and Charles Spencer, 9th Earl Spencer, boiled over. The two men fundamentally disagreed about the way that Diana's funeral should have unfolded, with royal officials hoping that Charles' two sons, then-Prince William and Prince Harry, would walk behind their mother's coffin. The earl, meanwhile, did not want the boys to have to endure such an intense public appearance so soon after the loss of their mother. Charles and Spencer had a phone call that was reportedly quite tense, and they barely stayed in contact in the aftermath of that conversation.

Interestingly, Charles and Earl Spencer's row was so awful that it didn't take long for rumors surrounding their argument to hit the press. Even back in 1997, it was reported that the House of Windsor and the House of Spencer could not seem to agree on how to honor the late Diana. At the time, though, the earl was still committed enough to the royal family that he denied all claims of disagreement. A 1997 piece in the Irish Times quoted Earl Spencer as declaring, "To suggest that there were divisions between royal officials and me in the period after my sister's death is so far from the truth as to be laughable." As time went on, however, the earl would change his tune.

Five years after Princess Diana passed away, her brother — Charles Spencer, 9th Earl Spencer — began to hint at his feud with King Charles III. Indeed, in 2002, the earl came out and said that palace officials had lied to him about the way Diana's funeral would unfold. Because Earl Spencer had repeatedly voiced his opinion that Prince William and Prince Harry should not be required to walk behind their mother's coffin, palace officials allegedly told him that the boys wanted to take on this ordeal. According to the earl, this had been a lie crafted with the specific intention of getting him to agree to the arrangement.

As Earl Spencer told The Guardian, "I was told that they wanted to do it and that they would like it if I were there; I now know that's not true." The earl went on to say that he had always supported the royal family's quest to put duty first; however, in that particular situation, William and Harry's rights were violated. "I thought that was where tradition and duty went too far against human nature ... But it wasn't a general criticism of the royal family. It was aimed very directly," he explained. While the earl's account clearly struck a chord with many royal fans, it did nothing to smooth things over with Charles.

As Princess Diana's death approached its 30th anniversary, Charles Spencer, 9th Earl Spencer, reignited his feud with King Charles III. With the publication of his book, "Swan Song: Diana, My Sister," the earl tore open old wounds by rehashing the terrible pre-funeral row that had ruined his relationship with Charles back in 1997. In his book, Earl Spencer confirmed that there had been a heated argument about whether Prince William and Prince Harry would have to walk behind their mother's coffin. This time, though, the earl touched on what had been said. At one point in the conversation, Charles reportedly told the earl that the House of Spencer lacked a certain commitment to the monarchy. "That's the problem with your family. They've got no bloody sense of duty!" the king allegedly said, per the Daily Mail.

From there, things allegedly went from bad to worse. According to the excerpt from Earl Spencer's book, Charles exploded in rage: "'Rest assured,' he hissed, 'we'll forget her soon enough!'" The earl replied to these words with a statement of disbelief and then hung up the phone on the heir to the British throne. Since the dispute took place, Earl Spencer has taken the opportunity to reflect on why Charles may have said such a thing. "[H]e unleashed down the phone what I have always taken to be his pent-­up contempt for Diana, and his horror that the world was so bowled over by her death," the earl wrote.

The British royal family has long embraced the policy of "never complain, never explain," but when it comes to the feud between King Charles III and Charles Spencer, 9th Earl Spencer, that refrain apparently does not apply. Just hours after Earl Spencer's less-than-flattering claims about his phone call with the king were published in the Daily Mail, Buckingham Palace issued a response. As reported by the BBC, the statement read, "His Majesty is mindful that the pain of fraternal grief can cloud reason, affect judgment and color memory in ways others do not recognize, even many years after such a loss." These words were largely interpreted as a denial of Earl Spencer's sensational claims.

Regardless of what was really said during that fateful conversation in 1997, most royal experts agree that King Charles was never the same after Princess Diana's death. As journalist Tina Brown noted in the documentary, "Diana: 7 Days That Shook the Windsors," per the Express, "He knew, instantly, that this was going to be a terrible thing, that he will be blamed, that they [the Royal Family] will be blamed, for the death of Diana." Despite the turmoil that Charles felt following Diana's death, however, at least one journalist from the 1990s was willing to side with the Earl Spencer. According to Diana's media connection, Richard Kay, the earl's account of the row was consistent with his notes from 1997. 

The fact that King Charles III denied the claims made by Charles Spencer, 9th Earl Spencer, only magnified the pre-existing tensions between the two men. Earl Spencer was quite upset by the palace's response. In a conversation with the Daily Mail, the earl condemned the palace's response. "It is not every day you wake up to find you've been gaslit by the king," he quipped. Spencer went on to note that the palace statement was not exactly a direct denial, stating, "It was astonishingly provocative and below the belt because it was essentially trying to say I'd lied without the king being able to deny what I'd said."

The earl also sat down for an interview with the BBC, during which he claimed that Charles was perhaps ashamed of the way he had apparently behaved all those years ago. Confronted with the possibility that Charles might have been upset by his revelations, the earl asked, "Well, is he furious? Is he furious or is he embarrassed?" Princess Diana's brother then went on to question the palace's denial even further, adding, "Genuinely, that is what he said. I don't hear him saying [in that palace statement] he didn't say that." Fascinatingly, the earl also shared that Charles had barely communicated with him throughout Diana's lifetime. Although the two men were brothers-in-law, they had rarely spoken by phone. According to the earl, the infamous row took place during their second-ever phone conversation.

Charles Spencer, 9th Earl Spencer, knows a whole lot about King Charles III, but he's willing to keep it all a secret — for now. Following the palace's denial of Earl Spencer's accusations against the king, Princess Diana's brother hinted at all the insider scoops that he's been keeping under wraps for decades. "This is not a threat, it's a fact, I know lots of things about the king which I chose not to include in the book because they were not relevant," the earl shared in a BBC interview. Responding to this comment, the interviewer noted, "Sounds a bit like a threat."

The earl then went on to tell the same interviewer that he had no intention of making the king — or anyone — uncomfortable. "No, not at all a threat, it's just the reality ... I'm not threatening. I've got no interest. I'm not a salacious writer," he said. Naturally, it seems that the earl doth protest too much. By telling the BBC that he could publish "salacious" stories about the king, the earl was essentially warning the palace against taking too strong a stand against his words. 

King Charles III could not respond to all of claims made by Charles Spencer, 9th Earl Spencer, without compromising the royal family's history of disengaging from the press. However, nothing could have stopped the king's loyal friends from standing up for him in the court of public opinion. One of Charles' close allies told The Sunday Times that the Earl Spencer was only adding to the press mania that had haunted Princess Diana throughout most of her lifetime. "It is an irony lost on no one except perhaps the author that a man who once accused the media of hounding Diana to the grave has now peddled in the public bazaar what little remained of her privacy," they said.

Another one of Charles' friends raised questions about Earl Spencer's motives and questioned his character. "I suspect most people in the real world either don't care about the whole thing or, if they do, they will make up their own minds about the reliability and morality of a much-married man like Charles Spencer," the anonymous insider said. A complete timeline of Spencer's complicated relationships will effectively show that he's on his fourth marriage. For some, bringing up the earl's relationship history was a grand defense of the monarchy, but, for others, it was simply a cheap shot. Regardless, these words can hardly be expected to diffuse tensions between the king and his ex-brother-in-law.

King Charles III's aides have a theory as to why Charles Spencer, 9th Earl Spencer, has chosen to rock the monarchy with his revelations. Apparently, the earl is frustrated with Charles' success. At the end of the day, the king did not become the most despised man in the world. King Charles' popularity in the U.K. is surprisingly high for a monarch who has survived a series of terrible scandals. And, although the timeline of Charles' relationship with Queen Camilla is totally suss, the once-hated couple has gained the forgiveness and understanding of the public. According to one of the king's friends, the Earl Spencer could not accept this evolution.

Speaking to The Sunday Times, one of Charles' team members explained, "Britain and the wider world [have] come to have a good deal of fondness and respect for them both. I suspect that's what Spencer can't bear." According to this anonymous source, the earl did not likely publish the book for money. Apparently, he did so to enact revenge. As the aide quipped, "So, out have come the crested carving knives."

There's no question that the feud between King Charles III and Charles Spencer, 9th Earl Spencer, is deeply personal. Both men had totally different relationships with Princess Diana. Both adored her — and disappointed her — in different ways. Because of this dynamic, the bitterness between the king and the earl is palpable. Although he denies publishing anything salacious against the current monarch, Earl Spencer has included some interesting information about Charles in his book, "Swan Song: Diana, My Sister."

In a portion of the book, the earl revealed that Diana had been jealous of a friendship between Charles and his then-valet. Apparently, after telling her brother that she was going to get divorced, Diana said (via the Daily Mail), "My husband is in love with his valet." In his book, the Earl Spencer expressed doubt over the veracity of these claims. "She did not name the member of staff, and I never asked her who it was, or why she would believe such an improbable thing," Spencer wrote. That said, royal experts have questioned the earl's choice to include that anecdote in the book. Speaking to the Daily Mail, journalist Richard Kay noted, "My only view is that Charles Spencer, to use that rather well-worn cliche about revenge being a dish best served cold, decided to put it in for that reason." To outsiders, that reason seems less than clear.