What Nicole Kidman's Famous Exes Have Said About Her Over The Years

Hollywood legend Nicole Kidman doesn't just have pop stars writing about hit songs about her. She's got her exes talking, too. One of Australia's most notable exports, Kidman has been in the spotlight since the late '80s since her breakout role in the 1989 psychological thriller "Dead Calm." Since then she's worked with ultra famous directors like Stanley Kubrick and Baz Luhrmann, starred in everything from cult classics to Oscar-winning hits, and even earned an Oscar herself for her work as Satine in "Moulin Rouge!".

Her skill as an actor has kept audiences interested in her work for decades, but it's also made people curious about her life off screen, particularly her romantic life. And Kidman having a roster of famous exes has made her romantic life even more fascinating. Grammy winners, Oscar nominees, character actors, and more, Kidman's list of exes reads like the front page of a tabloid, and they've all had plenty of pull-quotes. Here's what Nicole Kidman's famous exes have said about her over the years.

How many times has Nicole Kidman been engaged? Well, if anyone was including an engagement to Tom Burlinson in that count, take it out. According to the Canadian actor, that never happened. In a 2020 interview with The Sydney Morning Herald, Burlinson gave a succinct account of his relationship with Kidman, and he cleared up a longstanding rumor about how serious it got. "Nicole Kidman and I made a movie, 'Windrider,' in 1986 and dated for three years. I was 11 years older and it was her first relationship with a man as an adult. We had happy times, but she had her own path to take in life. One thing that has been written about us, which is incorrect, is that I asked her to marry me and she said no. I've only proposed once in my life," he told the outlet.

Some people say that all relationships in a person's life happen for a reason, and others disagree. It seems likely that Kidman would agree with that sentiment, especially when it comes to her relationship with Burlinson, because even though it didn't work out between them, the relationship did lead Kidman to one of her closest friends, Deborra-Lee Furness. "Nicole and I met through Tom Burlinson, who she was dating when she [was] about 17. She slept on the couch and partied," Furness told Australian Women's Weekly in 2019 about the start of her friendship with Kidman.

One of Nicole Kidman's first relationships after becoming a high-profile actor was with Marcus Graham. Like Kidman, Graham is also an actor and he is also from Australia. The two dated when they were in their early 20s, and while the relationship lasted a couple of years, it ended rather abruptly when Kidman met Tom Cruise. The eventual Oscar winner began dating the action star and fell madly in love, leaving Graham shattered. 

Regardless, Graham doesn't harbor any ill will toward Kidman. "A brilliant, gorgeous, talented actress meets big Hollywood movie star and he says, 'Come with me.' I think you say, 'Go, are you mad?' It must have been wonderful for her," Graham told Woman's Day in 2023. "I was devastated and heartbroken, but that's the way it goes, isn't it? Why would I want to keep her in Australia and lock her away?!" he said.

If, at the time, Graham did have any resentment toward Kidman and Cruise, he was vindicated years later when the marriage ended. Rumors whirred in the press that a rekindling of Kidman's romance with Graham was the reason for her split from Cruise. Graham's team denied that rumor, though, fully supporting his famous ex. "I don't have anything bad to say about Nicole ... I don't have any bad feelings there and I understand. At the time I cried for a long time. I was really hurt and confused, but I had lots to learn about the world," Graham has since said.

Nicole Kidman had somewhat of a whirlwind marriage to Tom Cruise. It wasn't a whirlwind in time — the couple were married for over 10 years. But the two were completely enamored with each other. The couple met in 1990 on the set of their film "Days of Thunder." They very quickly started dating and fell in love, and within a year of meeting each other, they were married. "Suddenly I was 22, 23 years old and I had this huge movie star husband. But it just seemed completely natural. We just fell madly in love and it was that simple," Kidman told British Vogue in 2026 of their romance.

The relationship wasn't without complication, though. Kidman continued, "I remember people saying to me, 'OK, well this is really going to affect your career.' I'm like, 'I don't care. I'm in love. I want to be married ... Of course I'll throw my career away. I don't care.'" 

They were right — her marriage with Cruise did affect her career, but in a good way. When Cruise was tapped by legendary director Stanley Kubrick to star in his film "Eyes Wide Shut," Cruise urged Kubrick to cast his then-wife in the film, too. "I flew out to [Kubrick's] house and I landed in his backyard ... Then it was basically he and I getting to know each other. And when we were doing that, I suggested Nicole play the role [of Alice]. Because obviously she's a great actress," Cruise told Sight and Sound Magazine (via Hello!) in 2025.

Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise's relationship lasted through the filming of "Eyes Wide Shut." By then, the couple had welcomed two children together, Bella Kidman Cruise and Connor Cruise, and their marriage was in a good place while making the Kubrick classic. "We were happily married through that," Kidman said in a 2020 interview with The New York Times. "We would go go-kart racing after [intense] scenes. We'd rent out a place and go racing at three in the morning ... We had two kids and were living in a trailer on the lot primarily, making spaghetti because Stanley liked to eat with us sometimes. We were working with the greatest filmmaker and learning about our lives and enjoying our lives on set," she added.

Kidman and Tom's relationship soon began to deteriorate. In 1999, the couple attended the premiere of "Eyes Wide Shut" together, and in 2000 they attended the Oscars and the premiere of "Mission: Impossible 2," which marked their final public appearances as a couple. In 2001, the duo filed for divorce, citing irreconcilable differences. 

And that was about as much detail as Kidman and Tom ever gave regarding why they divorced. In a 2002 interview with Vanity Fair, Tom said of his split from Kidman, "She knows why, and I know why. She's the mother of my children, and I wish her well. And I think that you just move on. ... Things happen in life, and you do everything you can, and in every possible way, and there's a point at which you just sometimes have to face the brutal reality." He then went on to address the public's fascination with their relationship, stating, "Honestly, people should mind their own d*** business."

Lenny Kravitz can be counted as one of the men Nicole Kidman was engaged to. Just a couple years after divorcing Tom Cruise, Kidman met Lenny. The Oscar winner was renting the Grammy winner's apartment, and their rental agreement turned into a romance. But it was about the most secretive romance of all time, especially by Hollywood standards. The two eventually confirmed that they were dating, but when engagement rumors circulated, they stayed mum. "They're very close. He's very important to her. Beyond that, I don't know," Kidman's team said at the time, per People.

But the romance wasn't meant to be. Kidman and Kravitz broke off their engagement without ever publicly confirming that it happened. In fact, in a 2007 interview with Vanity Fair, Kidman still didn't name Lenny when speaking about an ex-fiancé. "It just wasn't right. I wasn't ready. We weren't ready. I get engaged and I get married — that's my thing," Kidman said. 

It wasn't until an interview in 2017 that Kidman finally confirmed her past engagement to Lenny. When asked by Net-a-Porter's The Edit (via ABC News) about her "Big Little Lies" co-star Zoë Kravitz, Lenny's daughter, Kidman said, "Well, I knew Zoë because I was engaged to her father. It's all in the family! I love Lenny; he's a great guy." And it sure sounds like the feeling is mutual. "Nicole is amazing," Lenny told Mr Porter (via news.com.au) 2017. "I have stayed friends with my exes, in most cases."

Hollywood is its own small town, so someone's ex-fiancé is bound to work with their daughter at some point, right? At least that's what happened with Nicole Kidman, Lenny Kravitz, and Zoë Kravitz. As previously noted, Kidman and Zoë worked together on the hit series "Big Little Lies," and their personal history ("I was a grumpy teenager with her," Zoë told Elle in 2020) didn't get in the way of their working relationship at all. In fact, the two got along great. "I feel protective, like a big sister, toward her. She is carving her own path with confidence and grace," Kidman told the outlet, proving they had come a long way since Kidman's engagement to Lenny.

And Lenny was nothing but supportive of his daughter and his ex-fiancé working together. On an episode of "Watch What Happens Live," Lenny was asked about his past relationship with Kidman and his thoughts on her professional relationship with his daughter. He said, "Zoë hadn't seen Nicole since she was younger, and so it was beautiful that they got to know each other as adults and make this great show together." As for why he and Kidman split up, Lenny said, "Some things just don't work, but the wonderful thing is we're all friends."

Nicole Kidman has had some long-term romances and quick flings, and her relationship with Q-Tip can be filed under the latter. Between her marriage to Tom Cruise and her engagement to Lenny Kravitz, Kidman reportedly dated rapper Q-Tip. Although Kidman has never spoken publicly about the nature of her relationship with the A Tribe Called Quest member, Kidman did say to a Fox News reporter in late 2002, "[Q-Tip is] a very talented musician, isn't he? But I don't know much about that whole world, do you?"

Q-Tip wasn't quite so coy. Per SFGate, when he was asked on a radio show in August 2003 if he had been intimate with Kidman, Q-Tip replied, "Yes, I have been." He and Kidman were seen together at several events throughout the first half of 2003, including a showing of the play "Long Day's Journey into the Night," where they were spotted holding hands.

Whatever went on between Q-Tip and Kidman didn't last long. Soon enough she moved on with Kravitz, and later she found herself married a second time. It was during her second marriage, when she became pregnant, that Q-Tip spoke highly of his ex. "I saw Nicole not too long ago when she was pregnant. And she just had the baby, so congrats to her. She was glowing when I saw her. She was very, very happy. I'm sure she's going to be a great mom," he said at a 2008 event, per Lainey Gossip.

Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman were a Hollywood power couple for almost two decades. The two met in 2005, and by the next year, they were engaged. Both native to Australia, the couple got married in Sydney in 2006, and they welcomed two children together within the first four years of their marriage. The couple always kept their relationship rather private, but the details they did share, coupled with their relationship's longevity, made the world figure that the two were in it for the long haul. Fans of Kidman and Urban were shocked and devastated when it was announced in September 2025 that the couple had separated. "[Kidman] didn't want this. She has been fighting to save the marriage," a source told People of the split. The duo's divorce was finalized by January 2026.

When they were still together, Urban frequently sang Kidman's praises. "She's the one that I was searching for my whole life, and everything not only changed but had to change in me if I was going to go that road," he said on a 2020 episode of "Armchair Expert." "It was literally like, 'You either get this right now, or you are never, ever going to get it right. This is your one shot.' Really, it felt so obvious." And when presenting her with the 2024 AFI Life Achievement Award, he gushed about what a force of nature she is on-screen. "I've always said this about her, she doesn't act, she accesses," he said. "She portals emotionally, mentally, physically. And her eyes? Those on camera, she can tell the whole story and never utter a word."

Given that Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban have children together, they are always going to be linked in some way. Because their children were minors at the time of their divorce, the former couple had to work out a custody agreement. "He gets Father's Day every year, and they share Thanksgiving on an alternate yearly basis. "But when it comes to Christmas in odd-numbered years, [Kidman] has the entire winter vacation from the time that school ends until the time school resumes after the winter vacation. In even-numbered years, they're gonna share that [winter vacation time] equally," an attorney told People of Kidman and Urban's custody agreement, noting that Kidman has primary custody.

While both parties appear to have moved on with their lives post-divorce, they also appear to be on good terms ... or at least as good of terms as two very famous people who just got divorced can be. Since the split, Urban has been pretty quiet about their marriage, but he did acknowledge on the "Jonsey & Amanda" radio show that he believes he and Kidman would've ended up in each other's lives no matter what. And on Kidman's 59th birthday — her first after their divorce — Urban posted an enthusiastic message to his ex-wife on Facebook: "happy birthday nicole mary!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Meanwhile, Kidman offered British Vogue her perspective on life after the marriage. "There was a point where I was very fearful and deeply vulnerable, which is exposing," she said. "And then at the same time [I'm] going, 'Well, I can either really not confront it and just curl up, or I can just go forward with an enormous amount of hope.'"