Body Language Experts Show Signs That Maria Shriver And Arnold Schwarzenegger's Marriage Wouldn't Last
We've seen a number of powerhouse A-list couples rise and fall over the years. Former pairings like Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt, Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin, Kim Kardashian and Kanye West all certainly made their mark on pop culture in one way or another, but there's one couple whose union that was presumably unshakable until it reached its spectacularly dramatic end. Maria Shriver and Arnold Schwarzenneger said their vows back in 1986, in a traditional church wedding surrounded by friends and family. At the time, Schwarzenegger's star was on the rise, while Shriver wasn't exactly a wallflower herself, anchoring for "CBS Morning News" in the Big Apple.
Their union lasted through the actor's career switch into politics when he successfully ran for governor of California in 2003, but all wasn't as it appeared. After Schwarzenegger's time in office came to an end, the world was stunned to find out that the "Predator" star had fathered a child with their housekeeper, Mildred Baena, in 1996. Shriver filed for divorce in July 2011; the split wasn't finalized until 2021.
Knowing this information casts a different light on Shriver and Schwarzenegger's relationship. Tense public moments that could have previously been put down to stress took on whole new meanings. Were there signs that this marriage was doomed for failure all along? The List spoke exclusively to body language expert, communication coach, and "A.W.E.S.O.M.E." author Jess Ponce III, as well as Nicole Moore, body language expert and celebrity love advisor, to get the scoop.
Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver seemed out of sync from the start
By 1990, Maria Shriver and Arnold Schwarzenegger had been married for a handful of years and were in their professional prime. By that point, Schwarzenegger had numerous big hits to his name, including "The Terminator," "Total Recall", and "Kindergarten Cop." Not only was he a master of the action genre, but he had also successfully transitioned into comedy, making him one of the hottest pieces of Hollywood property of the era. While Shriver was still a regular face on TV thanks to her work on NBC's "Today", she wasn't quite as famous as her actor husband.
Shriver has never detailed what it was like walking in Schwarzenegger's shadow in these early years, but you know what they say — a picture can speak a thousand words. The above snap, taken at the start of the '90s, shows the tanned and tough star walking assertively with one hand seemingly guiding his wife as she fixes her jacket.
"You can observe Arnold and Maria attempting to synchronize their steps," Jess Ponce III explains exclusively to The List. "At arm's length, it's evident that neither of them is perfectly in sync with their movements. While their pace is consistent, shown by their steps being in unison, the direction they face is slightly askew. She appears to be moving straightforwardly, while he steps to his left. Nevertheless, he reaches out to her, seemingly aiming to align their paths. Is this symbolic of their relationship at the time? Possibly."
Arnold Schwarzenegger was in the driver's seat while Maria Shriver was along for the ride
Everyone who's ever been in a long-term relationship knows that it's a partnership, but from time to time, one partner may steer the ship more than the other, be it with the grocery list or making vacation decisions. Stars might be famous, but they're no different ... though the challenges they face might be more complex than someone forgetting to pick up the milk. By 1998, Maria Shriver and Arnold Schwarzenegger had been married for over a decade and had four children together. Pictured above, Shriver can be seen walking behind her husband with a tight grip on his arm as he smiles at the cameras.
Schwarzenegger's star power is evident in this snap, while Shriver, dressed in chic, unassuming black, looks happy to fade into the background. Was that really the case? Expert Jess Ponce III says it's the Arnie show. "As their relationship progressed, it became apparent that Arnold assumed a more dominant role," Ponce tells The List. "A larger-than-life figure, he is clearly in the driver's seat. Maria is slightly behind him, holding onto his arm, providing him with focus. It seems to be the Arnold Schwarzenegger show, with Maria appearing to be merely along for the ride."
Shriver was no stranger to taking a backseat with famous connections, as the daughter of John F. Kennedy's sister, Eunice Kennedy. Little did she know here that she would become the first lady of California in just a few short years.
Maria Shriver's stance shows a potential lack of trust in her husband
A year later in 1999, the couple was still going strong, with yet another public display of closeness. In this snap, taken at the premiere of Arnold Schwarzenegger's movie "End of Days," the star can be seen holding Maria Shriver's waist while beckoning to her, as if to direct attention to her. Shriver looks like a 1960s starlet with a bouncy blowout, a tight white top, and long earrings, while Schwarzenegger looks dapper in a sleek black suit. They are all smiles, but while it may seem they are genuinely connected, still waters run deep, according to Nicole Moore, body language expert and celebrity love advisor.
Though the pair are closely entwined here, Shriver seems stiff. "Typically when a loved one pulls us close, our body leans into them and tips toward them because we want to be close to them," Moore explains to The List. "However in this picture, Maria's side remains upright and straight. This may indicate a dynamic between the couple wherein they want to be close but still maintain independence at the same time."
Additionally, Moore believes that while the "Twins" star seems keen to show off his wife and is proud of her, Shriver's stance could indicate that she isn't able to get to his level: "Maria smiles in this picture as if she's happy about Arnold's display that she's his, but her body language shows she can't fully lean into his embrace and perhaps she can't fully trust him."
Arnold Schwarzenegger's grip on Maria Shriver's wrist strikes the wrong chord
When Arnold Schwarzenegger won the California governorship in 2003, it was a huge moment for the Shriver-Schwarzenegger household. Arnold and Maria Shriver's lives over the next decade would change dramatically, putting them in a whole new sphere of the public eye. It begs the question, was Shriver prepared for how this would impact her marriage and her children? This snap taken at the time of his election shows the actor celebrating his victory, with a full-beam Hollywood smile as he takes Shriver by the wrist and throws her hand up in the air. At first glance, the couple looked elated, but when you zero in on Schwarzenegger's grip, it takes on a different meaning.
"Hand-holding typically signifies affection and connection," explains Jess Ponce III. "Yet here, they lack the typical interlocked fingers or palm-to-palm connection. Instead, he holds her hand up, seemingly handling her. It appears odd, hinting at an element of control." Shriver's curled-up hand also seems slightly resistant to her husband's gesture.
However, what it means about their relationship on a deeper level is harder to tell, though as we've seen, Schwarzenegger did seem disposed to making these possessive gestures when it comes to his wife. "Whether it's a fleeting moment or indicative of more profound issues, remains uncertain," acknowledges Ponce. Regardless of whether the actor was swept up in the moment or not, it certainly isn't the sweetest photo ever taken.
Maria Shriver's uneasy show of affection
With the election over and done with and the change official, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver became politics' new "it" couple. Whenever a public figure makes the transition into politics it causes quite a stir, and this one was especially poignant. As a member of the Kennedy dynasty, Shriver likely knew the drastic changes and challenges her marriage would undergo due to this career pivot, but she seemed up to the task — at least, on the surface.
When her husband was sworn in, Shriver wore a sharp grey skirt suit and played the dutiful first lady, standing by her man. However, rather than an affectionate show of unity, Shriver seemed on edge next to her confident husband. Jess Ponce III explains, "Maria seems uneasy. Her legs are crossed, her right-hand reaches out to Arnie, and her left-hand rests on her lap. Simultaneously, she faces 90 degrees to her left, away from her husband, seemingly engrossed in some activity." For his part, the actor grips his wife's hand in a "tight and possessive" manner, according to Ponce. "In the end, he appears strong, while she looks uncomfortable. The scene is awkward and tense."
Was this a sign that Shriver wasn't quite as down for the ride as she would have the rest of the world believe?
Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver's kiss was tense and performative
Interestingly, there were more awkward moments when Arnold Schwarzenegger was sworn into office than the aforementioned seated blunder. A different moment from the event shows Maria Shriver seemingly attempting to kiss her husband, but there's something unnatural and disconnected in their position. Shriver and her husband go nose to nose, their lips barely touching as they seem to be out of sync. Expert Nicole Moore told The List exclusively that although there seems to be genuine affection there, something else is apparent.
"The fact that the couple's noses are lined up for the kiss rather than their mouths is very telling," explains Moore. "This kiss does not imply intimacy but rather force. When a couple is used to kissing each other frequently, it's very rare for them to have a blunder with kissing, like Arnold and Maria have in this photo. Their body language here seems to suggest that they kissed because they had to, not because they wanted to."
Moore goes on to note that the actor's jaw and neck are very tense as if he doesn't want to kiss his wife at this moment: "Maria's face is softer here which could indicate that at this moment she did want to kiss Arnold while he was resisting and possibly just putting on a show for the cameras."
Their hand holding hid a secret most didn't notice
In 2006, Maria Shriver and Arnold Schwarzenegger were used to their duties as the governor and first lady of the Golden State. Public engagements came naturally to them, and while they certainly appeared happier than they would in years to come during this period, there could have been signs all along that something wasn't quite right. Here, the couple is pictured attending the first Annual California Hall of Fame Ceremony and Awards Show in Sacramento. Schwarzenegger looks every inch the politico in a dapper wide-legged grey checked suit and a sky-blue tie, while Shriver looks stunning in a chic black lace dress and dazzling jewelry.
To the casual observer, they may look like the epitome of fame and happiness here. They're connected, but it's not so much the physical connection that rings alarm bells, but how they're connected. Nicole Moore explains, "If the couple were more in sync, they'd likely be holding hands with the same finger even if they were doing a handhold with just a finger. The fact that Arnold is grasping Maria's pointer finger with his pinky shows that their energy is misaligned and perhaps the attempt at a handhold was half-hearted and performative." Moore also notes that Shriver's genuine happiness doesn't seem related to her husband at all.
It's a detail that many wouldn't have thought twice about, but it just goes to show that the devil is in the details.
They appeared to be having totally different experiences
Because of his role as the Governor of California, Arnold Schwarzenegger was often expected to appear at public events and give emotive speeches. It's simply part of the job when it comes to being a political powerhouse. In this snap taken in 2008, the actor can be seen with a shining smile addressing a crowd at a Habitat for Humanity event in Los Angeles. His arm is extended to emphasize his words, and while he appears confident and secure in his delivery, Maria Shriver lingers in the background, emitting a vastly different vibe to her husband.
Body language expert Jess Ponce III notes that Shriver looks tense and uptight. "Her pursed lips, intense eyes, and stern expression convey frustration or animosity," says Ponce. "In contrast, Arnold smiles, maintaining an upright posture with expressive hand gestures, appearing in celebrity mode as he addresses the audience." Perhaps most interestingly, Ponce notes that the difference between them could be an indicator here of what lay ahead for the pair.
"They seem to be engaging in entirely different experiences," she admits. "Despite both being stars in their own right, only Arnold shines in this moment. Could this divergence be a genuine indicator of why their relationship didn't last? Maybe." It's true that by this phase of their marriage, a pattern is identifiable. Shriver is always a step or two behind her husband, but perhaps playing the dutiful first lady was starting to wear thin.
There was an emotional distance between them
Maintaining an unwavering public facade must be tiring, but some are better at maintaining it than others. In 2010, Schwarzenegger was coming to the end of his governorship and had already been in office for 7 years. That's quite a stretch for someone who has no prior experience in the field. Perhaps it was beginning to wear him out, as this photo of the pair taken at the polling station for midterm elections shows neither of them in particularly good spirits. The couple are noticeably separate from each other, with Shriver turning her back to her husband and Schwarzenegger putting on a smile while he looks down at the table.
Usually a man with a thousand-kilowatt beam, the actor looks tired here. According to Nicole Moore, Shriver and Schwarzenegger's stances in this snap display an emotional separation between them. "We can see that his smile isn't fully genuine ... due to the fact that his eyes have no movement or creases as he's smiling. Typically in a genuine smile in someone of his age, we would see the eyes naturally creasing quite a bit as that happens involuntarily when we genuinely smile," Moore elaborates.
Moore goes on to say that while Schwarzenegger is making somewhat of an effort to appear happy, Shriver is totally uninterested in putting her game face on. "The couple does not appear to be moving in sync at all in this photo."
Maria Shriver and Arnold Schwarzenegger put on happy faces
When you're an A-list couple and have your photograph taken with other celebrity couples, there will always be cause for comparison. In this instance, the difference between Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver with basketball stars and their partners at a Hoop Heroes event in February 2011 couldn't be more apparent. This was taken after the governorship had come to an end, but before the pair announced their divorce (Shriver's Kennedy cousins reportedly pushed her to move forward with it). While the other couples pictured seem happy and connected, there's a visible gap between Schwarzenegger and his wife, who aren't touching each other at all.
Expert Nicole Moore notes that the actor appears to be leaning slightly away from Shriver and that they seem to be trying to put on a show. "Here the couple appears to be attempting to put on a happy face but failing to do so," she explains, going on to point out that Shriver looks frozen in place. "Her body language here indicates that she may have been emotionally frozen at the time and either unable to process what she was feeling or trying to hide her true emotions by putting up a frozen facade."
The action hero isn't doing such a good job of giving his usual razzle-dazzle, either, with Moore explaining, "His body language here indicates that something is weighing him down emotionally." As we know now, this could well have been the case, given their upcoming separation.